It can be really easy to find yourself stuck in the mindset of “everything is not working”, or some other variation of it, like “everything is the worst”, “nothing is going right”, “this all sucks”, “why can’t anything go well”. When you start to think this way, your brain kind of feeds on it – unintentionally – which is why it is SO HARD to pull yourself out of this type of funk or shift your mindset. And, since it is really hard to do, without an easy tool to grab and help out, you are likely to continue in this spiral and way of thinking, until you end up stressed out, overwhelmed and burned out. 

When I am stressed out, I notice that the first thing that goes is the acknowledgement of anything that is going well, and instead, my sole focus is on all that is not working, and looking for more things that fit that puzzle and continue to stress me out more. It’s unintentional and automatic, and happens so easily. 

Negativity, such as stress and these negative thoughts, is viewed as a threat by your brain. Your brain has a mission – to keep you safe and out of the way of potential threats, even the non-life-threatening ones, like paperwork, piles of more paperwork, changing policies, impossible schedules, unruly kids (your own and other people’s), annoying coworkers, demanding bosses, and being stuck at home for 24/7/365+. Your brain sees these as a threat and starts to stand guard, which causes you to spiral into stress and negativity, and automatically look for more of these things. It is no wonder those thoughts of “everything is the worst” dominate your brain space. It is an attempt to keep you safe that absolutely backfires. 

The key to pulling yourself out of these thoughts and this spiral into stress is to have an easy to use tool that will help you see all the other pieces of your day – the non-stressful, enjoyable, even good parts that your brain is overlooking, due to the calming, pleasing, peaceful, non-threatening nature of them. 

The way to do this is to practice positivity (not the toxic kind) via gratitude.

Gratitude helps you to shift your thoughts to the things in your day, no matter how small, that are going well. It could be something really big, or something small. Here are a few examples of gratitude:

• You get to socially distance with your best friend after a year apart and air hug.
• You get to video call your mom.
• The person ahead of you pays for your coffee.
• Your kid listens when you ask them to clean up.
• You get a reply back from an email that you weren’t expecting. 
• You have a cancellations (but still get paid) and now have 30 minutes to do something for yourself. 
• Your coffee was hot when you drank it. 
• You had a really yummy lunch.
• The sun came out. 
• It snowed. 

There are a lot of things that could qualify for this list, but your brain may overlook a lot of them, especially the small ones that make up most of your days, unless you train it to look that way through reflecting via gratitude practices. 

Since this type of thing is much easier said than done, it helps to have a few ways to get you into a routine of gratitude.

Here are 4 Ways to Practice More Gratitude:

• Journal
  • A gratitude or positivity journal is a great way to train your brain to notice some good things that have happened in your day and life. You can do this by writing down at least 3 things that would be considered positive, went well, you are grateful for, you are thankful for, or that are “working” for you. 
  • These are the opposite of what your brain usually focuses on, so they might otherwise be overlooked. There is nothing too big or too small to put in your journal. 
  • You can leave it a bullet point list, or elaborate as much as you’d like. 
• Meditation
  • You can also use gratitude in your meditation practice. Take a seat and get settled. Take a few deep breaths to begin. Then start to think of 3 things that you are grateful for. 
  • If you want to take it further, think of 3 things, then 3 moments from your day, and then 3 people. 
  • If you want, follow it up with a Gratitude Journal Practice.
• Recall 3 Things
  • You can also verbally recall or state 3 things you are grateful for, rather than writing them down or thinking of them. This adds a little bit of accountability to the practice and solidifies it, making it more real, than just thinking it. 
  • Try finding a person (your partner, kids, friend, family, etc) that you can either say these to or, in a pinch, send a text or voicemail to. And in return, they can send you theirs. 
  • You can also do this around the dinner table, when you head to bed, or when you are getting your kids to bed. 
• Mental Note
  • Another way to do this, if you want to start slow, or are a little hesitant to meditate, write or share aloud, is to simply make a mental note of your gratitude. 
  • You can do this throughout your day, anytime you need a reminder or have something you are grateful for. 
  • You can also do this right when you go to bed or wake up, or even at the start or end of the work day. 
  • Just think of the things you’re grateful for, make a mental note, and you are finished. 

For more gratitude practices, make sure to sign up below for the SLP Toolbox, where you’ll find gratitude meditations and journal templates, or purchase the “Gratitude Action Plan Guide” from the SLP Stress Management Shop.

Now that you have a few strategies to start practicing gratitude, it’s your turn to put it into action! Leave a comment below sharing which strategy you are going to start implementing, or already use, in your day. 

Much Love, 

Jessi