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8Aug

3 Mindset Shifts for the Upcoming School Year

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Burn Out Career Advice New SLP Perfectionism Stress Management
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mindset shifts for the school year

When I started working in the schools, way back when, I was terrified and confused and had NO idea what I was doing. All of my previous jobs, and most of my grad school training and focus,  had been on working with adults in the medical field. I had worked in schools before, in undergrad, but this was totally new to me and I felt completely unprepared. And, so my stress grew. I tried to figure out ways to make the school year more enjoyable and more steady, but I either felt like I was falling behind or not doing enough.

I worked at a school with very lovely people, and multiple SLPs. I had administrators that supported me and we enjoyed working together. And, that first year, the school psych, who was also new to the building, would show up at my office door so we could try to figure out needs and reports and all the things together. 

But, even so, I still felt a little alone and that I was not enough as an SLP. The disconnect that I felt was not something that was talked about much, and I felt that I was wrong for not being as enthusiastic and excited and driven as the other SLPs – basically, I was not constantly frazzled and in an uproar about therapy materials, laminating things, going to extra meetings, putting in time before and after school, and living and breathing “SLP” life. 

My mindset and perspective were focused on the lack, the negative, and the “wrong” things I was doing. And with that, I only really saw those things and my focus was on all that was not how I wanted it to be. 

It kept me from making more connections, from seeing my students as people, and from really and truly being able to see the parts of my job and work that were  working and that were maybe even a bit more functional than the things others were doing each day. 

It took me a very long time, and a lot of perspective shifts, to finally feel comfortable with the way I approached my work, and to feel that I did not have to do it all and be all things in order to do good work, to help my students thrive, and to BE an SLP. 

It was not easy to shift into a new mindset, and at times those former voices and outlooks come to pull me back in. The biggest difference now is that I can recognize them, bring my awareness to them, and use them to learn rather than be pulled down by them. 

If you are feeling this way in your work, here are 3 mindset shifts for the upcoming school year:

  • There is no need to strive for perfection.
    • Being an SLP means that there is a tendency to lean towards perfectionism (chicken and the egg situation – did this come from grad school or is it why you chose the profession? Either way, it is still happening). You want things to be done perfectly and to do them perfectly, and you want to be perfect each day to show you are good enough for this job (hello, Imposter Syndrome!). When it doesn’t happen (because we are humans, working with humans), it can be frustrating and make you feel defeated and annoyed. And this can lead to a lot of stress when it happens over and over again. 
    • Instead of aiming for perfection, focus on two things: what is working and what you can learn. When you look at what is working, it helps you to see the strengths you have and gives you a direction to keep moving forward in. What works for you, and what you are good at doing as an SLP, may look different than another SLP or colleague. This is good, because it keeps things growing, and gives opportunities to learn and for students to have different experiences. When you look at what you can learn, it takes the stigma and shame away from making a mistake or not fully knowing something, and gives you a place to shift, grow, and make changes within it. Not being perfect is no longer a flaw, but a chance to learn more about a therapy material, practice, or way of doing something. 
  • Check in with yourself:
    • No one is going to show up at 100% each day. If you expect this (there’s that perfectionism kicking in again), it will lead you to feeling frustrated and that you are not enough. Some days will be easier, some will be harder. Your students will have days that are easy for them and days that are not. And all of this is ok and very, very human. 
    • Instead of pushing to be 100% all the time, meet yourself where you are and aim for the best of that. Check in with yourself in the morning when you wake up or right before you begin your day. See how you are doing and where you are at. If you are tired and overwhelmed and feeling more 35% than 100%, give yourself some grace – shift to an easier session or allow yourself to not bring as much energy, understanding it is because you are tired and not because you are a horrible SLP. 
  • Don’t expect it to be good right away/the first try.
    • I was terrible at anything athletic or body related growing up. And so I was told I was not and would not be good at them. It kept me from trying anything new or related to them. But I loved moving my body and working out, and, eventually, I learned that I could just keep trying, set a goal, and make small steps to improve in my way. And now I teach yoga and mind-body fitness classes, have run 2 half marathons, and am known as the “active mom” around my daughters school. But it could have been different if I kept expecting to be good at things right away.
    • Being an SLP is a lot like that. You might not be very good at first, at least not at everything. Or you might just have some questions or need to try a few ways of doing therapy (books, crafts, games, tabletops, active activities) before you find what works for the way you work.
    • Give yourself time to try a few things and come back to that “what did I learn? ” question. This keeps you in a growth mindset and a place of learning. Not because you don;t know enough but because you want to learn more. 

As the school year begins, again, or you are just looking to have a new start at your work, consider coming at it with a new mindset. This can help to let go of some of the pressure that creates stress, and give you more space, connection, and enjoyment from the work you do. 

You are an amazing SLP, even when you feel that you are struggling and unsure. Give yourself grace, look at what you can learn, see what is working, and know that you can reach out, ask questions, and you do not have to be perfect. 

What mindset shift are you looking to make this year? Share in the comments below!

For more resources to help with stress and build resilience, sign up for the FREE resource library, The Resilient SLP Toolbox. You’ll get meditation audios, yoga class videos and more. Enter your email below to subscribe.

With Love and Light, 

Jessi

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22Jul

3 Important Boundaries to Set as an SLP

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Career Advice Reduce Stress Stress Management
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boundaries to set as an SLP

The life of an SLP – bringing work home, staying late, going in early, taking on way more than is possible (not always by choice), never feeling like you did enough, always having more work to do, working on weekends, bringing it home (to either work at night or feel guilty about the pile of papers still in your bag)…and the list goes on. 

Yes, there are also super enjoyable and rewarding parts of the job as well. 

Things like, helping people communicate more efficiently and with function, educating families and providers and educators on the best practices and the ones that remember to bring humanity back in, that moment when you see the student or patients hard work pay off and they reach that big goal. The feeling that you made a difference in the world and that even bigger feeling that the person you work with is making a difference in the world. 

And, sometimes, it’s just fun. It can be a really fun profession to work in.

You can sing songs with kids, have dance parties to follow directions, play silly games, read and make-up stories, and have conversations with adults about alllllll kinds of things while working in their communication. 

Unfortunately, those parts that are super hard often outweigh or start to erase the other pieces. 

For one – it is how your brain is wired. You are automatically going to look for the negative and the challenge (without looking for the opportunity to grow), and start to focus more and more on these things. It does not mean there is something wrong with you, it is the way your brain tries to protect you and alert you to potential stress and threats that could harm you. But really, its the constant alerts that do the most harm – keeping your stress response turned up and leaving you in a constant state of stress, overwhelm, and , eventually, burnout. 

So what can you do to make it better?

This like advocating, changing the system, reworking policies, and the like are always hot topics and ABSOLUTELY need to be done. BUT there will still be stress in them. The real thing to do – so that you can be grounded and ready to take those bigger actions – is to start managing and turning down the stress response, so that you can start to see not only the negatives and challenges, but those good and beautiful pieces again. 

A super helpful way to do this, and to create much more ease in your day, is by creating better boundaries as an SLP. 

The lines of work and home are often very blurred for SLPs, due to the nature of the work, the workloads that many face (especially in the school systems), and the need to so it *perfectly* or fear that you are not enough (aka Imposter Syndrome, which runs wild in our field – thanks grad schools!). It is more common than not to bring work home or stay late, to work outside of your paid hours, and to not feel you’re able to say “no” – or just not be used to saying “no”, so it is really hard to do. 

All of these breakdown any boundaries that help you have time to shift your brain to new things, process your day, and work through the stress, while finding time for joy, hobbies, and just life that is not revolving around being an SLP. 

Setting up better boundaries can help you to find the space for other parts of your life again. 

Here are 3 Types of boundaries to set as an SLP (and human!): 

Physical Office Boundaries:

This is important if you share space or if you are working from home. Having a physical space that has a literal boundary is incredibly important. As SLPs, we like to joke about how we often have a closet, corner or a room, or shared space of 3 SLPs to do our work in, and we joke, because if we didn;t, then we would probably break down. It is really, really hard to do your job without a proper space. But it is also really hard to set boundaries of “sorry, I am unavailable” or “I am working on something and can;t talk right now”, or just having some quiet time to think. 

If you are working from home, make sure you have walls and a door, so you can do the work. And, if this is not possible, set up some kind of partition or divider, so you can have more of a room to work in. It helps to send the message of “this is my (sacred) space, you need permission to be here”.

And that, OMG, is a huge thing.

Emotional/Mental Boundaries:

The biggest part of this is being able to set boundaries that help with your mental health and emotional needs – specifically setting the boundary of “No”. This can seem really hard to do, and it is. You are probably not used to being able to say no in your work (again, thanks grad school), or letting someone know that it is not something you want or realistically can do. 

I get it. As an SLP, there are so many things that contribute to wanting to say yes to everything. Not wanting to disappoint or upset someone, not wanting to admit you can’t do it (perfectionism), not wanting to seem weak, fear of being fired, wanting to prove our profession is just as amazing as others, not wanting to be overlooked so you do it all to please everyone. 

But saying “No” is a huge boundary that does one thing – creates more space. 

By saying “no”, you set a boundary that protects your mental health, by reducing stress and the overwhelm of taking on more. It also gives you more room emotionally to recharge and process your day. And it frees up time for really focusing and delivering on the things you are already doing. 

And, saying “No” is the best way to advocate. If you take it all on, then it becomes expected of you and other SLPs to do the same, and then take on even more. 

PS If you fear saying “no” because of being fired, you should probably get out of there now. It’s toxic, not worth your time and effort, and there are other places to work that would honor and support you. 

Schedule/Day Boundaries

When I worked in teletherapy, I once had someone say to me “Isn’t it great you can take your work anywhere?:

I heard this a LOT when more people started working from home, and especially over the pandemic. 

And, yeah, at first that sounds great. You could go on endless “vacations” or travel, and at least in the fantasy world. In reality, it means that when you do go on a vacation, you are still working, not really on vacation, and your home-work boundaries get blurred. So there is no break, no breast and no recharge – just the added stress of everyone else checking out for vacation while you sit in a hotel room and type on your computer, or stay up until 11:45pm working after a day of fun. 

This happens on a smaller scale in your daily routines, and this is perhaps where it builds even bigger. Taking work home, going in early or staying late, not getting paid for the work outside of therapy time. All of this blurs the lines of work and home, and makes you feel like you are constantly working and constantly underpaid, with no breaks, no rest, and no time to process. This is where stress breeds. 

Having boundaries of “this is when I work and after this, even if I am not done, I don’t do more” is a necessity to make it, to survive, and to thrive as an SLP. 

It is so important to set some boundaries as an SLP. Focus on these each week, month or school year, however works for you, and stick to them, knowing that you will only feel better about the work because of it. 

If you are feeling more and more stressed from your work, or that there is not a lot of time when you are NOT working, try looking at your current boundaries. 

Where are the lines between work and home blurring? Where can you make some adjustments?

Then start to put them into practice by taking action – write it down, let someone know if needed, and mark your calendar or set up some reminders. 

It will be challenging at first, but this is the type of challenge that helps you stretch, grow, and come out the other side stronger and steadier. 

What boundary are you most struggling with? Share in the comments!

Want more tools to help you manage and reduce your stress? Check out the FREE resources in The Resilient SLP Toolbox. You can subscribe below by filling in your name and email, and you’ll get instant access to a library of audios, videos, and more to help you better manage and  reduce your stress.  

With love and light, 

Jessi

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15Jun

5 Ways to Shift Into Summer Mode

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Self Care Stress Management
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Shift Into Summer Mode

Summer Break, even when you don’t work in the schools, is usually a time when schedules get relaxed, vacations are taken, and there is time to finally decompress and take care of YOU.

At least in theory.

When you finally get that first day off, after the mad rush of doing it ALL to get there, it can be a little more challenging than expected to just let go.

And this goes for those shorter vacations, long weekends, and breaks during the year. 

I have spent more vacations and long weekends than I would like to admit, stressed and tense, pretty much right up until that last day or two before it ends. 

When you are used to being productive, go-go-going, and being very busy non-stop, it is super challenging to do the one thing you have been wanting to do for so long – nothing. Your brain and body have been trained to keep going and to keep doing, all year long. So, even though you are feeling mentally and physically exhausted and drained, actually relaxing and unwinding can be incredibly hard to do. 

It is not as simple as not working and feeling relaxed. There is a much bigger change and shift that might happen, or need to happen, otherwise you could end up spending the summer stressed about your inability to not be stressed. Which, of course, keeps you stuck in the Cycle of Stress, while letting it continue to grow. 

Let’s be real. Your brain is probably full. Your heart might be feeling full or feeling heavy. You are probably wanting to do a million different things with no idea when to start. You might not have the first clue on how to relax and “let go”. Or you might have a jam packed summer schedule that you are now trying to balance and figure out how to work. 

It is hard to shift out of productivity go-go-go mode, and to process the entire year, while also trying to do some other stuff. It is enjoyable, but really, it’s a temporary lifestyle change that can be welcoming and still challenging. 

To help, you can try using a few strategies to help you shift out of work mode and into whatever mode your summer needs. 

5 Ways to Shift Into Summer Mode

Allow time to shift:

Summer might start instantly, but you might not be ready in an instant – even when you soooo want to be. While ideally you would love to jump right into the summer schedules, plans, and sunshine, you might need a buffer to get you there. If you are feeling this way, try to take a day or two to just have nothing planned, or to do some things to wrap up the end of the year, so you can be ready for summer. Maybe you sleep a little more or read a bit. Maybe you grab a coffee or tea and then just relax for the day. Maybe you go to the pool alone or you let your kids know that you’ll just hang around for a day while you feel less exhausted. 

It might feel like FOMO or that you only have thismuch time to do all the things, but having that one or two days to just decompress, rest, and take it slow, can help you shift into a mindset where you will enjoy that time later even more. 

Have a transition:

Just like at the end of the workday, it helps to have a transition point – something to tell your mind to shift over into this new mode, and let the work go. 

It can be really easy to come home from work, and still be thinking about and mentally “at” work. And this is so very mentally exhausting, as you try so hard to be present but your brain is still in the office, at your desk, wondering about your paperwork piles and workload. 

The same can happen for the summer. 

You are physically floating in your pool and your mind is still thinking about how hard the year was, that one meeting that did not go as planned, how challenging that caseload was/is, and all the work that comes with the job. And you start wondering is it worth it, when will it be easier, is the stress going to continue or get worse, and on and on and on. 

Not an enjoyable float around the pool. 

Having a transition – something to signal to your brain that it is time to shift out of work mode – can help you at the end of the workday, but can also help at the end of the school year or before a vacation. 

Maybe you have a gathering with friends to celebrate. Maybe you toast or cheers or open the pool. Maybe you write down your thoughts and feelings about the year. Maybe you have a dance party by yourself. Maybe you find a class at the gym that you really want to go to, and now you can since it is summer time. Big or small, this can help you make the mental shift. 

Look ahead, a little:

While being in the present moment is absolutely a good thing, and the real goal of it all, it can also help to look ahead..a little bit. There might be some things that you want to do or places you want to go this summer break. Having this thing to plan and look forward to might be what you need to help you find a rhythm and routine for the summer. It can give you a purpose and a thing to do, not just for the sake of being productive, but to help you feel more fulfilled during the summer break, and like you have something that you are looking forward to doing, rather than feeling stressed about just wandering through each day with no aim. 

Grab a new hobby and keep it going

Another thing that is similar to goal setting or planning is to find a hobby – either a new one or one to get back to. This can help you find a way to do “nothing” this summer. But, it can also help you once you head back to work at the end of summer break, or your long weekend break. Having a hobby can help you set better work-life balance, and leave work at work, as well as give you that little shift to transition from work to home mode. You can get into a routine with it now, and then use that as your reason, if you need one, to not work long hours, to take time for yourself, and to have something that is your to plan to do. 

Take time to process:

Assess the year to help close it out and to process it all. There might be a LOT of things that you are feeling and thinking and still sorting out mentally from this school year. 2021-2022 was a tough one, maybe the toughest, for so many people working in the schools. And, when you are constantly going to get through, you might not have had time to process, really let it all sink in, or work through it. So that stress may bubble up to the surface, even though you’re just sitting back and reading a fantasy novel. 

One thing that can help is to try some journaling. One that is useful is the brain dump, which helps you to unload a scenario or thought that keeps swirling about your mind into a new place. Another is to look at both “what was challenging” and “what went well” as a way to look at those things that were particularly challenging and acknowledge them, and then also to see what you are doing well and what is working for you, so you can keep shifting towards those and using them. 

If you are feeling a little stressed about the ease of summer, or the lack of ease that is showing up, try one or a few of these and help yourself to shift into summer mode. 

Want more resources to help?

Join the Resilient SLP Toolbox for more resources to help you in this transition and all summer long. In the Resilient SLP Toolbox, you’ll find meditation audios, yoga and mindful movement class videos, journal templates and more. You can subscribe to this free resource, and access it immediately, by entering your email below. 

Which are you going to try to help ease into summer? Leave a comment or send a message to jessi@jessiandricks.com

With Love and Light, 

Jessi

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12May

5 Things I learned in yoga teacher training that (surprisingly) helped me as an SLP

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Career Advice New SLP Stress Management Yoga
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things I learned in yoga training

When I was in my second year as an SLP, three big things happened in my career and life: I finished my CF (finally), I started yoga teacher training (yay!), and I was laid-off due to budget cuts (wtf?). It was such a mix of joy and hardship and not knowing what I was going to do, and it absolutely sent me into some burnout and chronic stress in the year(s) to follow.

On the SLP side, I ended up going from a hospital setting, with inpatient and outpatient adults, to working in the schools with all ages. I was the solo SLP, aside from my supervisor.manager, and now I was one of three SLPs in my school. And I felt like I was the one who was faking it, floundering, and not as “into” it as they were. 

I had a tough caseload I was taking over. The schedule was set-up by someone else and was NOT compatible for my needs or life. I hadn’t really shifted to school-mode yet. And, a part of me really wanted to teach yoga more, which, at the time and where I lived, was not exactly something that was talked about or put into practice as an SLP.

I ended up leaving a year later, for 5 years. During this time, I taught yoga and mind-body fitness, and helped run yoga studios where I lived. I absolutely used my yoga teacher training to teach yoga – obviously.

But, it was when I came back to being an SLP, that I realized I could use it there as well. There were a few things I learned while training to teach yoga that helped me be, IMO, a better SLP. Or at least feel better about HOW I was working as an SLP. 

And they had nothing to do with incorporating yoga poses, meditation time, or even, really, mindfulness into my sessions. 

Here are 5 things I learned in yoga training that (surprisingly) helped me as an SLP:

1 You can’t look at someone’s face and tell if they are enjoying or getting anything out of the experience.

When I was going through yoga teacher training (YTT), one of the things that the current teachers would share, over and over again, was that you can’t look at someone and know what they are thinking or feeling during the class by the look on their face. They might be smiling, seeming to enjoy it, but internally cursing at you or thinking “why did I bother coming today?”. Or they might  be scowling, maybe even at you, or frowning, but only because they are working through something or concentrating, and fully soaking up and enjoying the experience. 

I learned this firsthand, in my very first class I taught. A woman in the front row had a look of disgust on her face most of the class. And I thought, “oh, sh*&, maybe I’m not very good at this teaching thing yet”. After class, she came up to me, as I internally panicked, and let me know she enjoyed the class very much and was surprised I was a new teacher – it was one of the best classes she had taken. It helped me know what was working as a yoga teacher, and where my strengths landed. 

The same goes for being an SLP Your student or patient  might look bored or annoyed during the session, or even a little checked out. This by no means is a reflection of what they are really thinking or feeling. They might be concentrating, thinking about how to use this in class or outside of the clinic, or trying to figure out what the next step in the task is. Instead of judging yourself and your work, talk to them about the experience after, if they are open to it, so you both can give feedback and shape things from there. 

2. Know what (class) you are teaching, and look at who walks in the door.

As a yoga teacher, you have to know what type of class you are teaching – hot or not, fast or slow, level 1 or level 2 – and have some sort of idea of what to do. But you also have to see who shows up for that class on that day, and what their needs and abilities might be, especially if you teach in a community center or gym, rather than a specific style studio. It might be a more advanced class that day, but, if it’s the only class at that time and the students are not advanced, or they walk in and are exhausted and tired, more than usual, then you have to tailor it to them, and their needs that day. 

This is what happens when you work with humans, having a human experience. 

The same is true for Speech Therapy. You can plan a little and know the goals for who you are seeing, but also see how they are when they show up. YOu might have to make some adjustments or try to grab a new resource to use if they are tired that day, if they are energized beyond measure, or if they are hungry or grumpy or being human in some way. Having this flexibility (no ygpa pin intended) will take you far, and help them more in the long-run.  

3. Having a “rolodex” of poses/resources is a better strategy than planning it all out exactly

(PSSST, this is probably the most important and used thing I learned in yoga training).

Here is a secret – I did not plan a single yoga class for YEARS, and rarely do now. There were no lesson plans or sequences after those first few classes I taught. And I never felt lost or stuck or like I wasn’t giving it my all or that my students would leave with “less” because of it. Once I knew the class style, and practiced or planned a class or two, I relied on the advice from one of the yoga teachers from my training – instead of planning out precisely, think about having a “rolodex” on file of how it all goes together. 

This “rolodex” was like a file to flip through, where you could pull out a pose, and then see who it was connected to  – what other poses could link to it and how to build them together naturally, and, often, in the middle of the class. 

It meant really and truly understanding how they worked together, rather than just what looked good on paper, and helped to make adjustments for who was in the class that day. 

In reality, it looked like knowing the style of the class, how that format flowed, and then choosing a pose to work to or to try or an area to focus on, and then building around it as it went.

As an SLP, this is the most helpful advice I was ever given.

It saved me from over-planning and prepping and feeling stressed to do more. And, because the over-planning does not come naturally to me, it helped me loosen the guilt around not spending hours before and after work plotting out each day and creating lesson plans for it. 

What it gave me was the insights to look more at what I was working on, what that goal was really for, and how to find a way to use it, know matter what materials I had on hand, what I pulled off a shelf or website, or what the student requested to use that day. It brought HUMANITY back to it. 

4. Something is better than nothing/Any bit counts for something.

It doesn’t have to be all or nothing each and every time. There were so many times that I wanted to share so many poses, to hit every part of the sequence, or every part of the body (hips, twists, folds, standing, seated, core, backbends, savasana), and it just didn;t happen. It might have been time-management, or that the students needed to linger in a pose longer than planned. And it was ok. The students still got a lot from it, and, maybe, got what they needed, which was better than hitting every piece exactly. 

While it is important to try and get as much as you can, and to work towards the goals you have in front of you for your students, there are times when it is not going to happen. Again, it is part of working with humans. You have plans, and they are living creatures. They might not always match up. 

Even if you end up spending the session talking together or laughing or not focusing on the specific activity you planned, it is ok. It is WORTH it. Because that day, you might be the only kind person they wrun tino. Or the only time they feel they can talk or share or try to communicate safely. Or the only moment they laugh. Or the only person who smiles at them. And THIS is huge. It is so important, and it does, absolutely, make a difference towards halogen them to improve their well-being – which is usually the ultimate goal. 

5. No one will know if you make a mistake or if it doesn’t go as “planned”.

I still have dreams (nightmares) sometimes that I get up in front of the class to teach, and I totally forget what to do and spend an hour trying to remember, until time runs out. Super fun. Very relaxing sleep. 

But, when it comes down to it, there are plenty of times when I have forgotten the next pose, not taught the pose I meant to in the moment, or accidentally changed the sequence or left out an entire chunk of it. And a funny thing happens. No. One. Notices. Or. Cares. And sometimes, it works out better than what I had in mind anyway. 

What I learned in yoga training was this – you can plan (not too much!) and if  you change it or make a mistake, no one knows!! Because YOU are the only one who knows the plan. If it changes to you, the students don;t know. There is NO mistake made to them. In their eyes, this is exactly what was planned.

I learned to just go with it. 

As an SLP, this is haaaaaaard to do. Because perfectionism is strong in our field. And judging and critiquing yourself is commonplace. 

But, if you have an activity or are trying to work on something, and you accidentally do it “wrong”. NO.ONE. KNOWS. It is ok that your plan shifted by mistake. Your students and patients will experience it as what you meant to do that day, and won’t notice. They will still get something out of it, simply because they are there with you.

Mistakes happen, it is ok to do. And you can usually learn something or maybe find a new therapy tool along the way. 

While I also learned some cool “yoga” tricks and tools to use in sessions, and some ways to be more mindful as a practitioner of Yoga and SLP, these are the big things that I learned in toga training that helped me to grow, be more comfortable, and to start to enjoy being an SLP. And, truthfully, they are what helped me feel most connected to my work, and, more importantly, to who I was working with. 

For more resources on yoga, meditation, and other ways to build resilience, enter your email below and get FREE resources to help you stay connected as an SLP.

Which one of these things I learned I yoga training surprised you the most? I’d love to hear how you are going to try to use them in your SLP sessions. Leave a comment below or reach out to jessi@jessiandricks.com.

With Love and Light, 

Jessi

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16Mar

Toxic Positivity vs Positivity for Stress Management

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Stress Management
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toxic positivity vs positivity

Stress, especially in the SLP and Helping Professional world, is a common thing and something that you have probably struggled with a lot in the last two years, and just as possibly before that. Without finding ways to work through and manage the stress, it can shift to full-blown burnout. This is where having some tools to help really comes in handy. 

One of the biggest tools of Stress Management is the use of Positivity. It can help you to shift out of the negative thought spirals, reduce the stress you are feeling, and prevent it from coming back by building resiliency.

But it has to be real positivity to work. Otherwise, it can backfire.

Positivity is sometimes used to tell you to just keep smiling, cheer up, and that there is no use in feeling down. And when you’re stressed, among other times, it can be a really not so great thing. In fact, this “only seeing the positive ” and “maintaining a positive mindset at all times” is known as Toxic Positivity. 

This type of positivity forces you to only look at the good, constantly seek the blessings in disguise, and believe that everything happens for a good reason – even if it includes trauma and incredibly difficult circumstances. 

This is when positivity itself can become not-so-positive.

So, with so much stress and stressful moments, is there room for positivity? Is it even a good thing?

Yes, positivity itself is great. Toxic Positivity is just that – toxic.

According to the site VeryWellMind.com, Toxic positivity is the belief that “no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. … We all know that having a positive outlook on life is good for your mental well-being. The problem is that life isn’t always positive. We all deal with painful emotions and experiences”. 

This is not the same as “positivity”.

Positivity, by definition, is “the practice of being or tendency to be positive or optimistic in attitude”. It is more than just “being happy”. Positivity is being aware and mindful of the positive aspects and moments of your day and life to help cultivate more optimism, kindness, and positive outlook, while in turn decreasing the feelings of negativity, anxiety and chronic stress.

When it comes to Toxic Positivity vs Positivity, one focuses on ignoring, invalidating feelings and creating false reality, while the other focuses on the full picture and perspective.

Here is the thing, your brain is absolutely wired to find the negative and seek out the stress and potential stress around you. And this keeps you seeking more stress and fires up the alarm system in your stress response. That is why once you have one stressful thing, if you aren’t able to process it and move on, it can feel like things start to snowball and there are SO many stressful moments happening, without anything else. 

Toxic Positivity would tell you to stop with the negative and “cheer up!”. It’s not happening and there is no room for that in your life. And, while that sounds great, it absolutely makes you feel like you are “wrong” for feeling stressed. It also doesn’t do anything to address the stress you are feeling and facing, and help manage it. 

Positivity, on the other hand, allows you to notice the stress without ignoring it – because your brain is naturally doing that – AND it helps you to also notice the things that your brain is not focusing on – the good moments of your day, the pieces that are going well, and the things you can learn and use moving forward. 

One says failure isn’t an option and doesn’t happen, the other says I failed, it sucks, what can I learn from this for the next time. 

It’s like Toxic Positivity is “this, but…..” and Positivity is “Yes, and….”. Like, you are experiencing this stress, but look at the good that comes from it. Or, you are experiencing this stress, and look at what you can learn from it. One excludes the stress you are feeling, and one includes it with a way to move forward through it. 

Toxic positivity leaves no room for the feelings of negativity and stress. Positivity knows that you are already seeing and feeling the stress, and helps you see the other pieces as well. 

Toxic positivity is about ignoring the negative. Positivity is about the full picture. 

Here are some common phrases that show Toxic Positivity vs Positivity, one being more of a “toxic” positivity, and the other true positivity.

  • Good vibes only (toxic, because it doesn’t allow for other feelings) vs Good vibes (positive)
  • Everything happens for a reason (can be toxic, especially for trauma) vs How can I find purpose or meaning in this
  • Always look on the brightside (toxic, because it doesn’t allow for other feelings) vs What is going well (positive)
  • Failure is not an option (toxic because no room for other things) vs What can I learn from this (positive)
  • Smile!! Be happy!! (toxic, because, ew) vs Are you doing ok today? I’m here if you need anything. 

Where have you experienced toxic positivity when you are feeling stressed in your life? Sometimes it comes from others and sometimes it comes from our own inner voice and pressure. 

How can you start to make a shift in the language you use, to create true positivity, and lessen the toxic positivity?

Share in the comments below! Or send me an email at jessi@jessiandricks.com, or share in your IG stories and tag @jessiandricks 

For more tools that can help you to shift to the positive and reduce the stress you face, without negating how you feel, make sure to check out the upcoming SLP Stress Management Course. You can get on the waitlist to be the first to know when it opens for enrollment, and get some free resources to use in the meantime, by subscribing below. (I promise, I won’t ever spam you or share your details). 

And if you want more info on stress management, make sure to check out these CEU/CMH courses. 

With Love and Light, 

Jessi

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28Jan

What can building resilience do for you?

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Uncategorized
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building resilience

Stress is ongoing and ever-growing. There are tools you can use to manage it and help reduce it. And, while these are helpful and effective, they can also at times lead to feeling more overwhelmed and drained, the very things you are trying to work through, because you are so focused on the stress piece of the puzzle, micro-managing, always evaluating, and always focused on it.

If you shift your focus slightly, you can use these tools and strategies to not (micro)manage stress necessarily, but instead cultivate resilience around it. 

Resilience does not ignore the things that are really hard, seemingly impossible, and absolutely unfair. Instead it keeps you moving forward, not stuck in what is happening, but moving through it, feeling less overwhelmed and weighed down. It gives you hope and a way to take action. 

The APA defines resilience as “the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress”. This could be with health, finances, relationships, small stress, major trauma, workplace requirements, all things out of your control, etc.

You feel it, you let it sink in, you maybe move forward or you let it all integrate to become a part of you, and then you move and grow from there. 

Resilience = Your Superpower when it comes to stress.

Before the pandemic, we were facing major stress in the SLP and Helping Profession workplaces, and it has only grown since then.

Even in an ideal world and workplace, stress would come along in some way. So if it its there and that is the reality of the situation (which sucks and is not how any of us thought our lives would go), this gives you a way to utilize it, move through it, learn from it, and come out the other side, a little easier each time. 

Resilience offers a way to work with that stress, not avoid or hyperfocus or micromanage it away. It does not mean you welcome it and are happy to receive it, or that you ignore the not-so-great feeling you have or experiences you face, or that you only see the brightside. It means that you can come back from the stressful moments easier, with less of them staying with you, with less feeling of being stuck in the stress with no way out. 

Here are a few things that building resilience can do for you:

  • Stop the constant managing of stress
    • Instead of constantly focusing on the stress you feel, how much it is growing or not, and if you can manage it a little more, resilience helps to not let the stress affect you as deeply, and continually work through it without your focus having to constantly be on it. 
  • Keep stress from growing
    • Resilience gives you tools to cut through the stress and move forward from it, without letting it continue to grow and overwhelm you. It allows you to build practices that reduce the stress response and shift out of negative thoughts and patterns. 
  • Help you build a foundation of (non-toxic) optimism
    • Resilience is rooted in positive psychology and the practice of noticing what is working, what you can learn, and noticing the positive aspects of your daily life. This helps to build true, non-toxic, optimism, which helps your brain to rewire the stress response. 
  • Help you come back from hard times easier
    • Resilience gives you the tools to notice how you are feeling in those tough and challenging moments, and then use the tools to move through it and come back faster, oftentimes stronger. It is not what you wish the stress on anyone, but that you use the experiences in it
  • Reduce the risk of chronic stress and burnout
    • Resilience helps to lessen how deeply you are affected and overwhelmed by stressors, and keeps them from continuing to grow and build, leading to chronic stress or burnout. 

Now that you have a little better understanding of what resilience is, you can start to bring more of it into your daily life.

What can resilience do for you? Share in the comments below.

If you want to learn even ore and dive deeper into this topic, make sure to check out the “Building Resilience” workshop, now available as a single workshop purchase until January 31st, or available at anytime with a membership to The Resilient SLP Monthly Workshop Series. 

In the Building Resilience workshop, you’ll:

  • Explore what resilience is and what it means
  • Learn why it is so important when working through stress
  • Look at ways to build resilience in your daily life
  • Practice some resilience building strategies
  • Make a plan for building your resilience

You can find out more details on the series and how to sign up here: The Resilient SLP

With Love and Light,

Jessi

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5Jan

How to add in Mindfulness when you are already overwhelmed

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Stress Management
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mindfulness when you are already overwhelmed

Let’s face it, things are continuing to be stressful, and every time it seems you might catch a break, there is a new change, a new policy to adapt to, or uncertainty pops in. And, even before a pandemic, there was the stress of work – the balance of therapy vs admin vs life outside of work. The impossibility of getting it all “done” and the schedules that were too full and growing. These last few years have only amplified this.

And, a good thing, is that stress is no longer a hidden, secret word. It is well-known, managers and companies and bosses are recognizing it and trying to do something about it (even when it just looks like words or feels like it’s false), and saying you are stressed out doesn;t mean you are an outcast. It is the reality we all face and are welcome to talk about it.

The downside is that it’s stress. It’s stressful. And it has only grown. 

But you are not alone in it, and not helpless or hopeless. Even with the inevitability of it growing, you can still help to manage and reduce it, and build resiliency to the stress you face. This can be done through practices of Mindfulness and Self-Care. 

Mindfulness/Self-Care can be the thing that helps you be resilient to stress, and it can also be one more thing to do when you are feeling that same stress. It can seem overwhelming, when you are already overwhelmed, and like there is “one more thing” you have to do. This makes it easy to not do the things that will help you reduce your stress, and leaves the stress to grow further. 

So how do you make it a part of your day and daily routine without adding to more stress?

Give these tips a try to practice mindfulness/self-care when you are already overwhelmed:

  • Keep it simple: 
    • It absolutely does not need to be complicated to work – usually the easier, the more effective. Sure, an elaborate morning routine seems like fun and super cozy. It also seems super stressful to commit to and something that can become overwhelming quickly. Stretching, exercising, reading, journaling, getting outside, coffee in silence, a smoothie, and meditating all before your 6:45am wake-up call/get ready for work/kids wake-up doesn’t sound as good though, does it? It sounds hectic AF and like anxiety waiting to happen. Instead, keep it simple, so you can keep doing it.
    • Here are some ideas: Sit to meditate or deep breathe for a few minutes. Make a mental check in to see how you are showing up that day. Set your alarm 5 minutes early and use that time (whether you actually get up or stay cozy in bed) to reflect (write it down or mental note) or an intention or gratitude. Stretch or walk for a few minutes. Drink your coffee/tea in peace and quiet for 5 minutes (although, depending on your household and the people in it aka small children and pets, this might be easier said than done on some days). 
  • Don’t take a ton of time: 
    • While you are keeping it simple, keep it to a few minutes. Aim for 5-10 minutes. This can be added to your routines during the day, or you can wake-up a little earlier, pause before you head into work.
    • Your brain likes consistency, which is why those other habits are hard to break and new ones are even harder to build. So short amounts of time, that you can consistently do, are better than  huge, elaborate, time-consuming moments once in a while. 
  • Add it in where it already makes sense/tag onto another task: 
    • Overhauling can be incredibly overwhelming, and is usually not necessary. So instead of trying to completely revamp your routines and habits (even if they aren’t great), in order to create some mindful moments in your day, try adding them in where you are already doing something. 
    • For example: your coffee/tea is brewing, take those 5 minutes to deep breath, journal or meditate. Driving to work? Listen to a podcast you love. Before you jump in the shower or get dressed, stretch for 5 minutes or do some sun salutations. Tack it onto something you’re already doing, so it doesn;t seem like “one more thing”. 
  • Drop the perfection: 
    • Oof, that’s much harder to do than to say. But it’s the truth. You don’t have to be 100% at A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G and that includes your (grades and) stress management. Mindfulness is about showing up as you are and observing it, being present to it, and not judging. This builds awareness and helps you move forward with a more mindful mindset. And it allows you to do what you can, when you can, without guilt if you miss out or need to pause for life. 

Now that the overwhelm has been taken out of this, or at least lessened a bit, grab a notepad or sticky notes and write down a few ways you can start to do this. Remember, it’s not about perfection, so, just like with anything you do or teach, brainstorm it first and give some things a try. Come at it from a place of playfulness and exploration, without looking at it as one more thing you have to do, or a way to “fail” at your day.

Then share it with me! I’d love to see what you are up to and trying. Leave a comment below or snap a pic and share in your IG stories tagging me @jessiandricks, or send an email to jessi@jessiandricks.com.

Find joy and fun in this, and reach out to me at any time for support. 

With Love and Light, 

Jessi 

PS Want even more ways to add in mindfulness when you are already overwhelmed? Join the FREE SLP Toolbox and get instant access to mindfulness meditation audios, journal templates, and mindful movement audios and videos. Sign up below!


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21Sep

4 Ways to Sneak More Gratitude into Your Day

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Gratitude Self Care Stress Management
2 Comments

sneak more gratitude into your day

Stress is, unfortunately, inevitable. Deep down, stress is a good thing. It keeps you alive, keeps you safe, and helps prevent unnecessary things from happening, or heightens your senses and reflexes when a life-threatening event occurs. The unfortunate part is that it can also happen routinely, regularly, and chronically. This is when you need something to help you work out of the stress. 

Infusing your day with gratitude is a great place to start, and to help prevent future stress from growing. 

The way gratitude works for managing and reducing stress is by helping shift you out of “stress mode”. Your brain is wired, for all the reasons above, to look out for things that are stressful, or threatening, to you, and that could harm your safety. Once it finds something, it starts to look out for more and more things – no matter how big or small they might be. In today’s world, there is a LOT that can be picked up on as stressful, and this is why you are easily worn down by stress. Your brain becomes fixated on all the things that are stressful/bad/wrong/threatening/negative, and does not notice the things that are joyful/good/easy/working/positive, no matter how big or small. 

This means you could have a day that is full of small (or some big) moments of kindness, joy, thoughtfulness, success, care and more, but your brain has been trained (by itself and nature) to only see and recall the things that didn’t work out and could be threatening to you. 

When I am stressed, I can tell that my thoughts are focusing on the things that are not going the way I wanted them to, the things I am not able to change, and all the things that continue to be difficult. No matter how hard I try, at times, to push myself out of these thoughts and tell myself “you are spiraling into negativity”, it never just pulls me out of the stress. It brings more awareness, but there is still usually more stress to come. Instead, I need something to help bring joy, light, and balance back into my thoughts and outlook. 

Regularly practicing gratitude helps to shift your brain into better balance, training it to also see the things that are good from your day, that otherwise might go unnoticed, but can make a huge difference in your outlook, resilience to stress, stress management, and overall well-being. The hard part is to actually take a step and do the practice, both when you are feeling stressed and when you are feeling less overwhelmed. 

You can set up some set ways to practice gratitude, with journals, meditations, routines, etc. These are wonderful, but, at times, can also seem stressful or “one more thing”. You can also infuse your day with some gratitude practices that help to not only give you the practice, but create a life built around this gratitude, without feeling the pressure.

Here are 4 ways to sneak more gratitude into your day:

  • Dinner Table
    • When you sit down for dinner with yourself, your partner, your roommate, or your family and kids, try using this as an opportunity for gratitude. Take a moment to share 1 thing from your day that you’re grateful for or that went well or that is “working” for you. 
    • This gives some accountability and also creates a conversation that sparks from a place of gratitude. Plus, you might get to share an inspiring story, or learn and listen to one, that might have been forgotten or left out otherwise. 
  • Bedtime (for kids and grown-ups)
    • If you want to end the day with gratitude (something that studies show helps to create a more positive memory when reflecting) , try practicing gratitude when you go to bed, or when you get your kids to bed.
    • As you get into bedtime routine with your kids, have them share one thing that went well or that they are grateful for from their day.
    • You can also share your with your kid, or you can share your when you go to bed, or just make a mental note or jot it down or say it out loud when you go to bed alone. 
  • Morning/Evening Intention
    • You can also use gratitude, in journal or meditation form, as a way to start or end your day with intention. It can become part of your morning or evening routine. It kind of adds this into your usual morning and evening routines, so you are more tuned in and intentional. 
    • Take a few minutes to start your day with gratitude, setting the intention to live your day with gratitude, focusing on what is going well. 
    • You can also end your day, reflecting on what went well, in order to feel more calm and grounded when you end your day, and to let go of stress from the day. 
  • Sticky Note Reminders (when something “good” happens)
    • Another way to keep noticing gratitude is to have reminders near you of the good pieces of your day and life, so you are able to see them and be reminded, even when you forget to have a specific gratitude practice.
    • You can try keeping some sticky notes out, on your desk, dresser, counter, etc, that you can use to write down moments of gratitude or positivity when they happen. You have a really good coffee – write it down. You get great feedback – write it down. Dream job – write it down. Student reaches goal – write it down. You get 5 minutes to yourself – write it down. 
    • Then leave the sticky notes where you will see them and be reminded of all that is going well, especially in those times when all seems against you. Try leaving them on your bathroom mirror, your desk or computer monitor, a dry erase board in your office or classroom, or even in your car (if you use it to get to work). 

Now that you have a few ways to sneak some gratitude into your day, it’s time for you to put it into action. How can you add more gratitude into your day?  Share your favorite gratitude strategy (or the one you plan to start using!) in the comments. 

For more ways to practice gratitude, check out the Gratitude Planner in the SLP Stress Management Shop.

Or sign up below to access the free SLP Toolbox resource library.

Much Love, 

Jessi

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