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16Mar

Toxic Positivity vs Positivity for Stress Management

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Stress Management
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toxic positivity vs positivity

Stress, especially in the SLP and Helping Professional world, is a common thing and something that you have probably struggled with a lot in the last two years, and just as possibly before that. Without finding ways to work through and manage the stress, it can shift to full-blown burnout. This is where having some tools to help really comes in handy. 

One of the biggest tools of Stress Management is the use of Positivity. It can help you to shift out of the negative thought spirals, reduce the stress you are feeling, and prevent it from coming back by building resiliency.

But it has to be real positivity to work. Otherwise, it can backfire.

Positivity is sometimes used to tell you to just keep smiling, cheer up, and that there is no use in feeling down. And when you’re stressed, among other times, it can be a really not so great thing. In fact, this “only seeing the positive ” and “maintaining a positive mindset at all times” is known as Toxic Positivity. 

This type of positivity forces you to only look at the good, constantly seek the blessings in disguise, and believe that everything happens for a good reason – even if it includes trauma and incredibly difficult circumstances. 

This is when positivity itself can become not-so-positive.

So, with so much stress and stressful moments, is there room for positivity? Is it even a good thing?

Yes, positivity itself is great. Toxic Positivity is just that – toxic.

According to the site VeryWellMind.com, Toxic positivity is the belief that “no matter how dire or difficult a situation is, people should maintain a positive mindset. … We all know that having a positive outlook on life is good for your mental well-being. The problem is that life isn’t always positive. We all deal with painful emotions and experiences”. 

This is not the same as “positivity”.

Positivity, by definition, is “the practice of being or tendency to be positive or optimistic in attitude”. It is more than just “being happy”. Positivity is being aware and mindful of the positive aspects and moments of your day and life to help cultivate more optimism, kindness, and positive outlook, while in turn decreasing the feelings of negativity, anxiety and chronic stress.

When it comes to Toxic Positivity vs Positivity, one focuses on ignoring, invalidating feelings and creating false reality, while the other focuses on the full picture and perspective.

Here is the thing, your brain is absolutely wired to find the negative and seek out the stress and potential stress around you. And this keeps you seeking more stress and fires up the alarm system in your stress response. That is why once you have one stressful thing, if you aren’t able to process it and move on, it can feel like things start to snowball and there are SO many stressful moments happening, without anything else. 

Toxic Positivity would tell you to stop with the negative and “cheer up!”. It’s not happening and there is no room for that in your life. And, while that sounds great, it absolutely makes you feel like you are “wrong” for feeling stressed. It also doesn’t do anything to address the stress you are feeling and facing, and help manage it. 

Positivity, on the other hand, allows you to notice the stress without ignoring it – because your brain is naturally doing that – AND it helps you to also notice the things that your brain is not focusing on – the good moments of your day, the pieces that are going well, and the things you can learn and use moving forward. 

One says failure isn’t an option and doesn’t happen, the other says I failed, it sucks, what can I learn from this for the next time. 

It’s like Toxic Positivity is “this, but…..” and Positivity is “Yes, and….”. Like, you are experiencing this stress, but look at the good that comes from it. Or, you are experiencing this stress, and look at what you can learn from it. One excludes the stress you are feeling, and one includes it with a way to move forward through it. 

Toxic positivity leaves no room for the feelings of negativity and stress. Positivity knows that you are already seeing and feeling the stress, and helps you see the other pieces as well. 

Toxic positivity is about ignoring the negative. Positivity is about the full picture. 

Here are some common phrases that show Toxic Positivity vs Positivity, one being more of a “toxic” positivity, and the other true positivity.

  • Good vibes only (toxic, because it doesn’t allow for other feelings) vs Good vibes (positive)
  • Everything happens for a reason (can be toxic, especially for trauma) vs How can I find purpose or meaning in this
  • Always look on the brightside (toxic, because it doesn’t allow for other feelings) vs What is going well (positive)
  • Failure is not an option (toxic because no room for other things) vs What can I learn from this (positive)
  • Smile!! Be happy!! (toxic, because, ew) vs Are you doing ok today? I’m here if you need anything. 

Where have you experienced toxic positivity when you are feeling stressed in your life? Sometimes it comes from others and sometimes it comes from our own inner voice and pressure. 

How can you start to make a shift in the language you use, to create true positivity, and lessen the toxic positivity?

Share in the comments below! Or send me an email at jessi@jessiandricks.com, or share in your IG stories and tag @jessiandricks 

For more tools that can help you to shift to the positive and reduce the stress you face, without negating how you feel, make sure to check out the upcoming SLP Stress Management Course. You can get on the waitlist to be the first to know when it opens for enrollment, and get some free resources to use in the meantime, by subscribing below. (I promise, I won’t ever spam you or share your details). 

And if you want more info on stress management, make sure to check out these CEU/CMH courses. 

With Love and Light, 

Jessi

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21Sep

4 Ways to Sneak More Gratitude into Your Day

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Gratitude Self Care Stress Management
2 Comments

sneak more gratitude into your day

Stress is, unfortunately, inevitable. Deep down, stress is a good thing. It keeps you alive, keeps you safe, and helps prevent unnecessary things from happening, or heightens your senses and reflexes when a life-threatening event occurs. The unfortunate part is that it can also happen routinely, regularly, and chronically. This is when you need something to help you work out of the stress. 

Infusing your day with gratitude is a great place to start, and to help prevent future stress from growing. 

The way gratitude works for managing and reducing stress is by helping shift you out of “stress mode”. Your brain is wired, for all the reasons above, to look out for things that are stressful, or threatening, to you, and that could harm your safety. Once it finds something, it starts to look out for more and more things – no matter how big or small they might be. In today’s world, there is a LOT that can be picked up on as stressful, and this is why you are easily worn down by stress. Your brain becomes fixated on all the things that are stressful/bad/wrong/threatening/negative, and does not notice the things that are joyful/good/easy/working/positive, no matter how big or small. 

This means you could have a day that is full of small (or some big) moments of kindness, joy, thoughtfulness, success, care and more, but your brain has been trained (by itself and nature) to only see and recall the things that didn’t work out and could be threatening to you. 

When I am stressed, I can tell that my thoughts are focusing on the things that are not going the way I wanted them to, the things I am not able to change, and all the things that continue to be difficult. No matter how hard I try, at times, to push myself out of these thoughts and tell myself “you are spiraling into negativity”, it never just pulls me out of the stress. It brings more awareness, but there is still usually more stress to come. Instead, I need something to help bring joy, light, and balance back into my thoughts and outlook. 

Regularly practicing gratitude helps to shift your brain into better balance, training it to also see the things that are good from your day, that otherwise might go unnoticed, but can make a huge difference in your outlook, resilience to stress, stress management, and overall well-being. The hard part is to actually take a step and do the practice, both when you are feeling stressed and when you are feeling less overwhelmed. 

You can set up some set ways to practice gratitude, with journals, meditations, routines, etc. These are wonderful, but, at times, can also seem stressful or “one more thing”. You can also infuse your day with some gratitude practices that help to not only give you the practice, but create a life built around this gratitude, without feeling the pressure.

Here are 4 ways to sneak more gratitude into your day:

  • Dinner Table
    • When you sit down for dinner with yourself, your partner, your roommate, or your family and kids, try using this as an opportunity for gratitude. Take a moment to share 1 thing from your day that you’re grateful for or that went well or that is “working” for you. 
    • This gives some accountability and also creates a conversation that sparks from a place of gratitude. Plus, you might get to share an inspiring story, or learn and listen to one, that might have been forgotten or left out otherwise. 
  • Bedtime (for kids and grown-ups)
    • If you want to end the day with gratitude (something that studies show helps to create a more positive memory when reflecting) , try practicing gratitude when you go to bed, or when you get your kids to bed.
    • As you get into bedtime routine with your kids, have them share one thing that went well or that they are grateful for from their day.
    • You can also share your with your kid, or you can share your when you go to bed, or just make a mental note or jot it down or say it out loud when you go to bed alone. 
  • Morning/Evening Intention
    • You can also use gratitude, in journal or meditation form, as a way to start or end your day with intention. It can become part of your morning or evening routine. It kind of adds this into your usual morning and evening routines, so you are more tuned in and intentional. 
    • Take a few minutes to start your day with gratitude, setting the intention to live your day with gratitude, focusing on what is going well. 
    • You can also end your day, reflecting on what went well, in order to feel more calm and grounded when you end your day, and to let go of stress from the day. 
  • Sticky Note Reminders (when something “good” happens)
    • Another way to keep noticing gratitude is to have reminders near you of the good pieces of your day and life, so you are able to see them and be reminded, even when you forget to have a specific gratitude practice.
    • You can try keeping some sticky notes out, on your desk, dresser, counter, etc, that you can use to write down moments of gratitude or positivity when they happen. You have a really good coffee – write it down. You get great feedback – write it down. Dream job – write it down. Student reaches goal – write it down. You get 5 minutes to yourself – write it down. 
    • Then leave the sticky notes where you will see them and be reminded of all that is going well, especially in those times when all seems against you. Try leaving them on your bathroom mirror, your desk or computer monitor, a dry erase board in your office or classroom, or even in your car (if you use it to get to work). 

Now that you have a few ways to sneak some gratitude into your day, it’s time for you to put it into action. How can you add more gratitude into your day?  Share your favorite gratitude strategy (or the one you plan to start using!) in the comments. 

For more ways to practice gratitude, check out the Gratitude Planner in the SLP Stress Management Shop.

Or sign up below to access the free SLP Toolbox resource library.

Much Love, 

Jessi

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11May

4 Ways to Practice More Gratitude

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Gratitude Journal Techniques for SLPs Stress Management
Comments Off on 4 Ways to Practice More Gratitude

practice more gratitude

It can be really easy to find yourself stuck in the mindset of “everything is not working”, or some other variation of it, like “everything is the worst”, “nothing is going right”, “this all sucks”, “why can’t anything go well”. When you start to think this way, your brain kind of feeds on it – unintentionally – which is why it is SO HARD to pull yourself out of this type of funk or shift your mindset. And, since it is really hard to do, without an easy tool to grab and help out, you are likely to continue in this spiral and way of thinking, until you end up stressed out, overwhelmed and burned out. 

When I am stressed out, I notice that the first thing that goes is the acknowledgement of anything that is going well, and instead, my sole focus is on all that is not working, and looking for more things that fit that puzzle and continue to stress me out more. It’s unintentional and automatic, and happens so easily. 

Negativity, such as stress and these negative thoughts, is viewed as a threat by your brain. Your brain has a mission – to keep you safe and out of the way of potential threats, even the non-life-threatening ones, like paperwork, piles of more paperwork, changing policies, impossible schedules, unruly kids (your own and other people’s), annoying coworkers, demanding bosses, and being stuck at home for 24/7/365+. Your brain sees these as a threat and starts to stand guard, which causes you to spiral into stress and negativity, and automatically look for more of these things. It is no wonder those thoughts of “everything is the worst” dominate your brain space. It is an attempt to keep you safe that absolutely backfires. 

The key to pulling yourself out of these thoughts and this spiral into stress is to have an easy to use tool that will help you see all the other pieces of your day – the non-stressful, enjoyable, even good parts that your brain is overlooking, due to the calming, pleasing, peaceful, non-threatening nature of them. 

The way to do this is to practice positivity (not the toxic kind) via gratitude.

Gratitude helps you to shift your thoughts to the things in your day, no matter how small, that are going well. It could be something really big, or something small. Here are a few examples of gratitude:

  • You get to socially distance with your best friend after a year apart and air hug.
  • You get to video call your mom.
  • The person ahead of you pays for your coffee.
  • Your kid listens when you ask them to clean up.
  • You get a reply back from an email that you weren’t expecting. 
  • You have a cancellations (but still get paid) and now have 30 minutes to do something for yourself. 
  • Your coffee was hot when you drank it. 
  • You had a really yummy lunch.
  • The sun came out. 
  • It snowed. 

There are a lot of things that could qualify for this list, but your brain may overlook a lot of them, especially the small ones that make up most of your days, unless you train it to look that way through reflecting via gratitude practices. 

Since this type of thing is much easier said than done, it helps to have a few ways to get you into a routine of gratitude.

Here are 4 Ways to Practice More Gratitude:

  • Journal
    • A gratitude or positivity journal is a great way to train your brain to notice some good things that have happened in your day and life. You can do this by writing down at least 3 things that would be considered positive, went well, you are grateful for, you are thankful for, or that are “working” for you. 
    • These are the opposite of what your brain usually focuses on, so they might otherwise be overlooked. There is nothing too big or too small to put in your journal. 
    • You can leave it a bullet point list, or elaborate as much as you’d like. 
  • Meditation
    • You can also use gratitude in your meditation practice. Take a seat and get settled. Take a few deep breaths to begin. Then start to think of 3 things that you are grateful for. 
    • If you want to take it further, think of 3 things, then 3 moments from your day, and then 3 people. 
    • If you want, follow it up with a Gratitude Journal Practice.
  • Recall 3 Things
    • You can also verbally recall or state 3 things you are grateful for, rather than writing them down or thinking of them. This adds a little bit of accountability to the practice and solidifies it, making it more real, than just thinking it. 
    • Try finding a person (your partner, kids, friend, family, etc) that you can either say these to or, in a pinch, send a text or voicemail to. And in return, they can send you theirs. 
    • You can also do this around the dinner table, when you head to bed, or when you are getting your kids to bed. 
  • Mental Note
    • Another way to do this, if you want to start slow, or are a little hesitant to meditate, write or share aloud, is to simply make a mental note of your gratitude. 
    • You can do this throughout your day, anytime you need a reminder or have something you are grateful for. 
    • You can also do this right when you go to bed or wake up, or even at the start or end of the work day. 
    • Just think of the things you’re grateful for, make a mental note, and you are finished. 

For more gratitude practices, make sure to sign up below for the SLP Toolbox, where you’ll find gratitude meditations and journal templates, or purchase the “Gratitude Action Plan Guide” from the SLP Stress Management Shop.

practice more gratitude

Now that you have a few strategies to start practicing gratitude, it’s your turn to put it into action! Leave a comment below sharing which strategy you are going to start implementing, or already use, in your day. 

Much Love, 

Jessi

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17Jan

How To Create A Vision Board

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Goal Setting Reduce Stress Self Care
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Vision Board Pinterest (1)

Each year, I like to set an intention for the year – whether it is something small, like going to the beach more often, or something big, like paying off debt or starting a new training/school. Sometimes it is a simple mantra, like “expand” or “create joy”. This helps me to focus on where I want to go in the year, rather than what let me down or what I need to change from the year before. The intention is to bring in something more positive, so there are more positive shifts happening in my life throughout the year.

Similar to setting a goal, it helps me to make better decisions and gives me something to lean back on. With my intention in mind during decision making, I can make sure I ask myself “Is this moving me towards my intention for the year, or taking me further from it?”.  This strategy can work for new continuing education, certification or degrees; a new job or setting; or perhaps even a change in your lifestyle outside of work.

As January moves ahead, it is a good time to reflect on the goals and intentions you may have set for the year. You can start to see if you have been able to make shifts towards that intention you’ve set, or if that goal isn’t quite what you intended it to be. You can also see if your goals are already pushed back into the far corners of your mind as you make space for all of the “must-do’s” that are part of everyday life.

This happens really easily, and is one of the reasons why most of us either forget our intentions or just give up on them after a month or so. If you are feeling like your goals are already slipping away from you, or you are looking for a way to be more aware of them each day, you can try making them visual.

One way that I like to do this is to create a vision board. A vision board is a visual means of having your goals on display, around you, to see every day. These goals come as pictures, images, quotes, trinkets or anything that is meaningful to you. Having these items on display helps you to remember your intention, connect to it more often and feel as if you are really working towards it each day. It also helps give you more input to use when you ask yourself “Is this bringing me closer to my intention?”.

In the past, my vision boards have represented where I wanted my yoga practice and teaching to lead me, what I wanted to learn, how I wanted to develop my coaching practice and even what I wanted to do with our house once we moved. My boards usually focus on my career and personal goals or hobbies, as these are the areas I need the most clarity in, but they can really represent anything that you wish to work on.

Here are some examples of my boards in the past:

2012 Visions2013 Vision Board

A vision board is very simple to make and can be made for very little expense. It can be a fun project to do as part of your self-care on evening, or could even be a family night activity or part of a date night. If you run a business, this could be part of your business strategy sessions and planning for the year ahead.

How to create a vision board:

  • Grab some magazine or newspapers or flyers
  • Print out images or quotes that are meaningful to you
  • Find photos, pictures or even cards around your home
  • Paste or thumbtack them into your board
  • Place your board somewhere you see every day. If it is focused on your career, place it in your office. If it is focused on personal development, place it somewhere you work or attend to often. If it is relationship focused, or perhaps you made a board with your partner or family, hang it in your room or family space.
  • Each year, look back at your board and swap out things that aren’t meaningful or you have moved beyond with things for the new year.

That really is all there is to it. Once you create your board you are ready for it to work its “magic” and help you reach your intentions throughout the year.

Have you ever created a vision board before? If so, leave your tips in the comments below or in the FB group. If you want even more useful tools to help combat stress and burn out, make sure to sign up below for the SLP Toolbox.


You can also check out more on goal setting here. If you’d like to dive deeper in setting your goals and decreasing your overall stress, I’d love to work with you this year. You can email me any questions you might have to jessi@jessiandricks.com or schedule a phone/skype chat here. 

Much Love,

1741931346171517140715

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28Nov

4 Ways for SLPs to Increase Your Energy at Work

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Burn Out Well-Being
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SLP Work Energy Pinterest (1)

Have you ever had one of those days where you didn’t do anything physically, or even mentally, exhausting, but you feel completely drained and exhausted by the end of the day. These are the days that can easily make you feel like you are in the wrong job, aren’t good enough or are completely out of balance. I had one of these days recently, and just felt so exhausted by the end of the day. My caseload had been pretty easy, I had plenty of sleep the night before and I didn’t do any extra work that day. By the end of the day, though, I was too exhausted to make dinner, go for a walk or really be of much company to anyone.

It kind of sucked.

I often find that the days I sit at my computer, typing, for hours at a time are the most exhausting ones. The days where I am up and moving, or in and out of my office, are the days when I feel energized and ready to do more after work. Sometimes, it can also be a really tough caseload or overbooking my students. But other times, it has nothing to do with the work itself.

You might find that it’s not the work you are doing, but the way you are experiencing your work day that is taking a toll on you, physically and mentally. Your posture, the meals you are or aren’t eating, and what you are drinking might all be things that can zap or give you energy. If you often feel exhausted at the end of the day, try these 4 tips for more energy.

  1. Swap coffee for water, or at the least, tea.
    • Caffeine can be just what you need at certain times of the day. It provides a little invigoration, helps wake you up, and studies even show it helps to give you more mental clarity and focus. But overdoing caffeine can do the exact opposite. You might find your energy plummets, you feel jittery and nervous, and you suddenly feel scatter-brained.The best thing to do is to drink more water, whether or not you cut back on coffee. This will help you to stay hydrated and flush out any symptoms you might accidentally have from over-caffeinating. Try swapping out coffee for some caffeine-free or low-caffeine drinks instead. Tea is also a great option, hot or cold, if you need a little boost or flavor, without the huge crash from coffee. Go for a cup of coffee in the morning and a chai or green tea latte in the afternoons.
  2. Find some down time. 
    • Work can be all about productivity. If you aren’t helping clients and making money for the facility (or yourself), it might not seem like time well spent. Unfortunately, this type of go-go-go attitude can lead you to burn out, quickly. If you don’t have time to recharge at work, you won’t be able to keep up the pace, stay focused and get done what needs to get done, as efficiently.Have you ever had a day with no breaks and a million things to do, only to find yourself staring blankly at your computer screen, not focusing during your sessions and feeling completely disorganized with your paperwork? Instead of rushing around and doing a million things at once, take 5 minutes to grab a cup of tea, stretch, go for a walk, etc. You’ll be a little more clear headed, have more energy flowing through your body and be more ready to tackle the tasks at hand.
  3. Get up and move during the day. 
    • Sitting at a desk, in one spot during the day can really start to wear on you. NPR recently released an article showcasing just how many hours we sit during a day, and how it can affect your overall health more and more as you age. It’s not just your risk of heart disease, diabetes or weight gain, but also your body actually starting to age and tighten into a “sitting” stance. In yoga, sitting is done during meditation, with a tall spine, so energy and breath can travel through the body as you sit, and your digestive system is uncompromised and able to do its job. This is rarely the way we sit during the day at work. We tend to slump, slouch and cave in a bit. If you find it hard to sit with good posture, or find yourself sitting all day, you might notice your energy levels slump, you breath is more shallow and you feel sluggish and tired.To help combat this, take 5 minutes after every few sessions to get up and move. Walk to grab more water or tea or a bathroom break, do some push-ups and squats at your work station with your desk and chair or even just get up and stretch. You’ll release tension, lengthen your spine and breath deeper, so you start to feel more energized, focused and ready for the next patient or student to walk through your door.
  4. Eat Something.
    • When you are busy and stressed, one of the easiest things to forget is to take a break and eat. When I was working in the schools, I would often have just a few moments to grab my lunch, or eat a snack during my morning and afternoon. I was constantly hungry and has a stomach ache every day.  I also felt exhausted and foggy-headed on a regular basis. Most teachers and health care workers I know ate even less than that. Many would wait until the end of work to eat, or just drink coffee all day and have a really big dinner at night. Coincidentally, these were some of the people who were either super stressed or in really poor health.
    • Without nourishment from food, your body and brain are not able to maintain the energy and focus needed to get you through your work day. You r body needs the carbs and protein to maintain the proper energy levels throughout the day. Your brain needs healthy fats (like those in nuts) to function properly. All of these help to combat the feelings of mental fatigue and physical exhaustion we experience throughout the day. Not eating during the day, or not getting enough calories, can also send your metabolism into “starvation mode”. This means your body thinks you are trying to fast for the long winter, so it slows down and hold on to everything it can. It can cause you to gain weight or have a difficult time maintaining your weight, even though you feel like you never eat.  Make sure you have scheduled breaks for meals and snacks, even just a few minutes, so you are able to make a proper meal or snack to fuel you through your day. Have fresh fruits, nuts and whole grains nearby, so you’ll have something even on the shortest of breaks.

If you are feeling drained by the end of the day, give these a try. See which one might be affecting you the most and try to make a small change each day to increase your energy level. Leave a comment and share what works for you. You can help keep track of your energy levels with the “Daily Check-in” journal page found in the SLP Toolbox (subscribe below).

If you are still feeling exhausted and want to dig deeper into it, make sure to check out these webinars (certification hours and CEUs!) to reduce your stress, and increase your energy.

3 Common SLP Stressors and How to Manage Them  on Xceptional ED (1.5 CMH Hours)

Managing Common SLP Stressors before Burn Out Occurs on Northern Speech Services (2.5 ASHA CEU hours .025 units)

3 Biggest Stressors for SLPs and What to do About Them on SpeechPathology.com (1.5 ASHA CEU hours .15 units

The more awake and alive you feel at the end of a work day, the better you will feel after work and looking ahead to the next day.

Much Love,

1741931346171517140715

 

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15Sep

How to Start an SLP Gratitude Journal

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Gratitude Journal Techniques for SLPs Reduce Stress
Comments Off on How to Start an SLP Gratitude Journal

SLP Gratitude Journal Pinterest

At the end of the summer, I decided I wanted to start a regular meditation practice. I was feeling stress and anxiety creep in from moving, work and life in general. I hopped on YouTube and found a 21-day meditation practice, guided by Oprah and Deepak Chopra. I had done one of these before, so I knew it would be a good blend of meditation and life lessons. As I sat on my meditation cushion, listening to Oprah explain the purpose of the practice that day, she started talking about finding hope through gratitude. She mentioned how this was a turning point for her and that she had been keeping a gratitude journal for more than 20 years.

I realized that a lot of what I had been feeling, the stress and overwhelm, had to do with not recognizing the positive things that were happening each day. I would look around and see the things at my house that needed to be fixed: floors that weren’t finished, rooms that needed to be painted, boxes that needed to be unpacked, and the day-to-day chores that were piling up. I would look at my yard and see grass that needed to be mowed, clippings to mow and trees to trim, not to mention spiderwebs to knock down. My nightstand was full of books I needed to finish. Yoga mats were rolled up in their corner instead off being used. regularly. I wasn’t seeing the beauty and of my house. I wasn’t seeing the wonder of having trees surrounding me and trails to walk. The yoga mats were there for when I was ready to hop on them and the books were waiting for me to crack them open anytime. My brain was stuck in the cycle of waking up and seeing the stress, living each day with the negatives of the stress and not being able to make a change to break the cycle. I needed something to help me get unstuck. I decided that maybe having a moment to write down a positive to even just think of something positive from my day, or week, would help me get out of this funk.

As an SLP, and most likely a stressed out one, I know you can relate to this sinking feeling. At times it seems like nothing in your work setting is how it should be, you can’t help your clients due to lack of budget, training or support, and you feel absolutely overworked and underappreciated.

According to Positive Psychology, it takes 3 positive experiences to make up for a negative one. That means that our brains are wired to remember the things that aren’t great, instead of the things that are. When you look back on your day, if this balance is off, and you have more negatives than the 3:1 ratio, your brain will register it as a negative day. This also relates to your basic survival needs. When we were hunters and gatherers, we always had to be looking for the worst in things, and expecting it, as a means of survival. We had to look out for danger around every corner. Now we do not, but our brains are still ready for that threat at any time.

Your brain is also wired to define experiences as positive or negative based on which note they end. If you end on a low note, your are bound to remember the day as being negative. Think about one of those days when everything has gone great, but you have a fight with your spouse right before bed, you probably categorized that day as being  a “bad” or stressful one. Conversely, if you end on a high note, you are bound to remember it as being a positive day. Think about one of these days that started rough, but turned itself around with a few really fun and special moments that made you smile by the end of the day.

Having a gratitude journal can help to not only end on a high note, but also recall more of the positive things from your day, no matter how big or small they might be.

A gratitude journal is nothing more than a place for you to record your thoughts on a day or week, or even month. It is a place for you to reflect on all the good that has happened, and to look back over time at all of the good things that have occurred in your life. Many people, like Oprah, find that having years of gratitude journals to look back at help them to feel uplifted when they are feeling down, as well as look back over the years with fondness.

How to Write a Gratitude Journal:

  • Take 5 minutes out of your day, preferably at the end of the day, to start your journal. Try to do this right before you go to bed once a day, week or few times a month. At the end of the day, you’ll be able to reflect back on all that has happened. It will also help you to empty out your thoughts and end your day on a final note, which might help you sleep better.
  • List 5 things that you consider positive from the day. It doesn’t matter how big or small, as long as it was something positive. It could be a promotion at work or a new job, being recognized for your hard work, having a co-worked to vent with, baby smiles, a fun client, green-lights on your commute or simply a stranger smiling and saying hello.
  • Expand on each item. What emotion did you feel or do you feel when you think back on that instance in your day? What was it about that moment that made you feel so positive?
  • Optional: Try to find a way to continue it tomorrow. Reflect on how you can have that feeling on a regular basis. Maybe you make time for your friends, pay it forward with a kind smile or even recognize someone else for their hard work.

If you’d like even more, sign up for the newsletter to get access to the “Daily Reflections” guide full of daily prompts and meditations perfect for journaling. You can sign up below and you’ll receive access to the “SLP Toolbox” as well.

Where do you feel you are lacking gratitude in your life? Is it home life, work a bit of both? Leave it in the comments below with your intentions for starting a gratitude journal. If you’ve ever written one, leave a comment or comment on someone else’s post to let them know how it went for you.

Much Love,

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