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12Jan

How do I know when I should I step away from work or not?

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Career Advice
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step away from work or not

I was recently asked this question by a fellow SLP…

This year has been so overwhelming I’m thinking of taking time off from being an SLP. I know your platform is a lot of stress management and prevention but did you feel some time away gave you a fresh perspective?

When I was in my third year as an SLP, I had worked in 4 different settings; had anywhere from a 15 minute to a full hour commute (before traffic); had been fired, laid off, and quit due to legal issues; and went through 4 different CF supervisors before earning my CCC-SLP. Looking back, it is no wonder I hit burnout hard and found it nearly impossible to recover. Any one of those things would have been overwhelming, while learning to BE an SLP, but all of them combined was a real poo-storm of a few first years. 

It wasn;t all terrible. I really enjoyed a lot of the facilities I worked at and had wonderful co-workers. I had people there who supported me in my early career and who believed in me as a clinician. There were a lot of really good times and things I loved and learned so much from. And there was a lot of frustration that built up and became all I could see after a while. 

So, I quit in order to teach yoga and swore I would never return (which, of course, I did after 5 years away and some life changes). 

This isn’t meant to be some “and look how far I’ve come” story – because it is not that. It is more of would I do it again or do I recommend it to others……..not necessarily.

One question that I get asked a lot, and was asked recently, is if I think a person should leave their SLP (or other Helping Profession) job due to the overwhelming stress, or if they should stay with it. It is one of the toughest questions to answer, so here are my thoughts on it, especially with the extra demands and ongoing stress (and triggered stress response) of the pandemic. Do I recommend it? For some, it is not needed and other things would help, but for some people it is absolutely what is needed. It really depends on a few things that you would know better than me. But there are some ways to figure out which is for you.

Should I take time away from my work as an SLP or Helping Professional?

Here are some things to consider when deciding to step away from work or not:

  • Have you really and truly tried to manage or reduce your stress?
    • It sounds mean and a little like it’s all on you. That is not quite how it is meant to be. Here is the truth, even when you want to change, it is really hard to undo the patterns and habits you have been using and living with. It doesn’t matter if they are working or good for you. They are familiar and change is hard and it is scary. So, you have to ask yourself, have you really tried? If yes, have you given the tools time to work and time to work through them?
    • If you have done that, and have been working to reduce your stress, but it still seems to be on the rise and work is the main source, then it might be time to step away in order to better manage your stress.
  • What do you want from stepping away? 
    • Another big thing to look at is what you want when you step away. If it is to take time to reflect and work through stress, and you are unable to do that with the overwhelming amount of work you face,  then taking the time to step back might be exactly what is needed. If you are unable to have a moment throughout your day to pause or breathe or stop working, mentally and physically, then taking a step back might be the best bet. 
    • If taking a step back is to have the stress instantly go away, it is probably not a realistic thing to do, or at least not the only thing to do. 
    • If you step away from your work, without managing your stress, it will not go away (exceptions of course for toxic workplaces). Yes, it might feel great to be free from those obligations. That will make the stress feel like it has lifted, and a little bit may have. But it does not help you to turn down the stress response or give you tools to reduce and manage it in the future. It teaches you to keep leaving when things are overwhelming, not what to do when they are. And it will show up quickly in the next setting or when the next stressful thing passes by you. Managing your stress helps you to turn down the stress response, so it doesn’t keep taking over and keep you in overwhelm. 
  • Do you have a plan for the next step?
    • Yes, taking time away usually means time to recharge, regroup, and step away from the productivity hamster wheel you are currently stuck on. But – it can lead to more stress and overwhelm if you do so without some sort of plan or next step. 
    • Before you step away, if you decide to, ask yourself these questions
      • How long will I do this?
      • Is this permanent?
      • What do I want to try to do instead or for a while?

Now that you have a little more guidance in deciding if you should step away form work or not, start to work through this on your own. Grab a journal or notebook or a blank google doc and ask yourself each of these questions. Write down anything that comes to mind, even if you think it is silly, you’ve never thought it before, or you are unsure of it. Once you get it all out on paper, you can go over it again to help you come up with your plan and next steps. 

Want a little more support? Send me an email and we can set up a time to chat, jessi@jessiandricks.com. If you come up with a next step or have a little clarity – share it in the comments or in your IG stories, and tag me @jessiandricks. You can also subscribe here for more free resources: SLP Toolbox

No matter what you decide, it is your decision to make (whether it is the right step for you, for your family, for your future goals and dreams). You’ve got this!

With Love and Light, 

Jessi

PS Want to do more than manage your stress? Build resilience to it, no matter what is thrown your way. Check out more with The Resilient SLP.

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7Oct

Focus on What is Working for Less Stress

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Reduce Stress Stress Management
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focus on what is working

Ever feel like stress is just always there? Like it’s just hanging out, ready to find you in a moments notice?

If there’s one thing that overwhelm and stress can do, it is take you from feeling like you have it all figured out to having no idea what you are doing in about 2 seconds flat. This is because your brain likes to notice what is not working for you, and when it does, it sticks with it. 

To your brain, this feels safer and like the place that will keep you alive, and, sure, it will, physically, but it is NOT the place where you will thrive or feel better, or even feel well, mentally and within your life as a whole. 

Your brain is designed to keep you going. It is the number one job for your brain. All of the thinking, reasoning and problem solving, that we as SLPs love, is kind of secondary. It is still important and what makes us who we are as a species and as individual beings, but, in some ways, it is not the most important thing for survival. Breathing, organs functioning without thinking about it, and staying away from things that are threatening – that is what your brain has prioritized.

These are good things, but the part about always looking for threats can go beyond the life-threatening and into the mundane. The daily stressors, the negatives, and the things that are NOT working for you become the focus, and your brain can get stuck there, looking for more and more. 

And it WILL find them, because there is a LOT to find. And once it is validated, it will keep looking for more and more, getting stuck in a Cycle of Stress. 

It can seem a little hopeless and that there is nothing you can do to change this. But there is one very powerful thing you can do to start to shift your brain out of this constant search, and reduce the stress response and the stress you feel – focus on what is working. 

Your brain is not going to do this naturally. It needs a little prompting and pushing to get there. 

When you focus on what is working, you focus more on the positive or good things in your day, and pull your brain out of the constant effort to focus on everything that is not going well. 

It doesn’t mean you ignore it or forget about it, but that you notice that other piece of the day, too. You train your brain to notice more of that and to stop searching for things to stress about. 

It’s like how there are days when one thing happens and then you notice another, and, suddenly, it seems like 10 things that were stressful quickly piled on and now you are so overwhelmed, you don’t know what to do. This is your brain responding to “threats” and stressors. 

It happens to everyone. 

Focusing on what is not working is what your brain naturally does. Focusing on what is working is how you pull it out of the stress mode and train it to notice the other pieces, which helps to reduce the stress response and build some resiliency to it. 

Some days I get stuck in the mindset of looking at all that I am NOT doing right now (especially when I am tired, stressed and not feeling like I am connecting “enough” or doing “enough”).

I focus on all that I am not accomplishing and my wishful to-do list (the one that I want to be doing “instead” or “should” be doing or “would be doing if _____”)

Then I get sucked deeper and deeper into the trap of looking at what is not working, what I am not doing and I start to feel like crap or not good enough or that I am not doing enough and will never do enough. 

I end up validating my brains’ stress cycle, and causing more to occur.

All of this, instead of looking at all that I am doing. 

When I shift gears mentally (it is HARD) and focus on what is working for me today and lately, I realize there is a lot that is going well, and is not stressful. 

I focus on what is working, like:

  • Cooking and baking some really awesome food
  • Walking to and from school in the morning and afternoon
  • Getting outside with my kids more to PLAY
  • Having time to work
  • Having time to practice yoga
  • Running again
  • Reading more books than I have since before I learned that reading wasn’t “cool” as a pre-teen
  • Running an online course on Stress Management and a seasonal Workshop Series
  • Working with hospitals/schools/conferences/practices/SLPs to help with stress

When I shift into this mindset, it doesn’t ignore all the other pieces that I wish I had more time to do, but shows the bigger picture and perspective. It pulls me out of tunnel vision and perfectionism.

Then, I am able to think things like:

  • I AM doing a lot – just different things.
  • It’s enjoyable. 
  • It is worth it. 
  • There is no need for 100% or perfection. 
  • There is and will be time for more when needed. 

These are the things that are working for me and make up a big part of my day – a part that I enjoy. 

Here is how you can start to make this shift to focus on what is working, when you feel you are stuck and focused on what is not working:

  • Acknowledge some of the things that are not working (don’t ignore or pretend they are not there). 
  • Write down 3 things that ARE working for you or are going well
  • Brainstorm a way to keep these going and to do more of them tomorrow/going forward
  • Make a practice (similar to gratitude) of taking a moment to reflect on these each day, or a few times a week.

Give practices to try and create a journal – Do you ever find yourself stuck in this sort of pattern? Where you feel like you have dropped off for a while, are in a funk or sliding into one?

Take a moment to pause and reflect, what is working for you today? Write it on a sticky note to keep nearby (you could even share and tag in your stories), or share in the comments below!

Want a journal template to help you create a routine of focusing on what’s working? Grab the “What is Working for you” guide in the SLP Toolbox, as well as more resources to help you manage and reduce your stress.

Sign up below for free access.

Much Love, 

Jessi

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28Sep

Book Review: The Joy of Movement

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Book Review Mindful Movement
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joy of movement

This is not a sponsored post, nor do I have any affiliation with the book or author.

It is no secret that I love movement, especially what I consider “mindful movement”. It brings me so much joy and feels freeing, like the worries and stress and chatter in my mind are gone and I am just in the moment, present. It also feels really good in my body, not only to get out of my head and into my body, but to do something good for it. It physically feels better, as well as mentally. 

This has not always been so for me. When I was a kid, I really, really did not enjoy sports or running or anything that involved a specific type of moving. I did, however, enjoy riding my bike for fun, dance classes, and even going to the gym with my parents to check out the cool machines and group exercise classes. 

It was this joy that stuck with me years later, as I started to incorporate more movement into my day, mostly for health reasons and prevention. 

When I was at my darkest times and hardest times, movement was always there and was something I turned to to help me through. 

It is what I left the field of Speech Therapy to pursue and to take on as my career, training in Yoga, mind-body fitness and teaching group fitness classes. And even to this day, teaching a class is one of the times I feel the lightest, most present, and absolutely most alive and connected. 

So I was super excited to find the book, “Joy of Movement” by Kelly McGonigal, PhD. Simply the title had me hooked, like I was understood. And then when I started reading, one of the first paragraphs felt like someone finally put into words what I felt when teaching and moving:

“In the nearly two decades, teaching has become a source of tremendous joy and meaning. Over the years, I saw again and again how movement could shift a persons’ mood. How it could send someone back into the world renewed with hope. I got to witness how exercise could empower participants to sense their own strength, or give them permission to let loose. As I taught individuals of all ages and varied physical abilities, I learned how movement could serve so many roles. It was a way to practice self-care, an opportunity to tackle challenges, and a place to make friends.”

This book covers the science, and personal stories, behind why movement is so beneficial for us as humans and how we evolved to move.

Kelly McGonigal is a research-based psychologist and author, and lecturer at Stanford University. She has also written a book called “The Upside of Stress” which, being in Stress Management Coaching, is on my must-read list. She is also a group fitness instructor and lover of movement. Her writing style, while based in research, is really about stpry-telling. This book, about the science behind movement and how it can improve your happiness, is less about stating the research, and more about exploring how  the research shows up in real life, for real people.

The Joy of Movement covers some of the physical benefits of movement, but focuses on the mental and emotional benefits received from movement. 

It is a fairly shorter read, with seven chapters and about 200 pages. I found it pretty easy to understand and follow (although, it did take me a bit longer than I anticipated, but that was due to interruptions from life and my young kiddos:) ). The seven chapters of this book break down different aspects of this, from the “runners’ high” to addiction to community to moving through pain. 

  • Chapter 1 looks at the Runners’ High and the real purpose behind it – which is not just to enjoy running. It lpps back at human evolution and the chemical reaction in the brain
  • Chapter 2 looks at addiction and how exercise has been shown to help in recovery, as well as how it has similarities to the addictions at the brain level, without the negative components. 
  • In Chapter 3, we get to explore group fitness and community, and how these can help to build connections, keep you moving, but also keep you thriving. 
  • Chapter 4 looks at how movement can be wired in the brain and can help in healing and in reducing the limitations of degenerative diseases, even if only for a moment. 
  • Chapter 5 explores using movement to help with the obstacles that we face in life, and how it can help with mental and emotional growth, but also with pushing through physical obstacles that sometimes cause mental challenges, depression, etc. 
  • Chapter 6 focuses on movement in nature and the deeper connection that can be felt from being in greenspace, moving and breathing, and how this shows up in brain functioning and mood. 
  • The final chapter, 7, looks at ultra-endurance athletes and the ability for movement to change lives, as well as build deeper connections. 

The Joy of Movement  helps to explore the other side of movement that we often neglect or overlook – the pieces that can help us emotionally, mentally, and even spiritually, to thrive in our lives. It shares the stories of people, while also looking at the research, the science and explains how this is happening in the brain and body, as well as how we humans have evolved to move and to thrive from it.

I highly recommend this book to anyone who loves movement, wants to move more, or is looking for a way to find more joy in their lives. 

As someone who often uses and coaches about Mindful Movement, this book helps solidify how truly important movement is for overall well-being. 

How do you love to move? Share it in the comment below!

Much Love, 

Jessi

PS Want some free resources to help you reduce stress through movement and meditation? Sign up for the free SLP Toolbox, and gain access to meditation and mindful movement audios.

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21Sep

4 Ways to Sneak More Gratitude into Your Day

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Gratitude Self Care Stress Management
2 Comments

sneak more gratitude into your day

Stress is, unfortunately, inevitable. Deep down, stress is a good thing. It keeps you alive, keeps you safe, and helps prevent unnecessary things from happening, or heightens your senses and reflexes when a life-threatening event occurs. The unfortunate part is that it can also happen routinely, regularly, and chronically. This is when you need something to help you work out of the stress. 

Infusing your day with gratitude is a great place to start, and to help prevent future stress from growing. 

The way gratitude works for managing and reducing stress is by helping shift you out of “stress mode”. Your brain is wired, for all the reasons above, to look out for things that are stressful, or threatening, to you, and that could harm your safety. Once it finds something, it starts to look out for more and more things – no matter how big or small they might be. In today’s world, there is a LOT that can be picked up on as stressful, and this is why you are easily worn down by stress. Your brain becomes fixated on all the things that are stressful/bad/wrong/threatening/negative, and does not notice the things that are joyful/good/easy/working/positive, no matter how big or small. 

This means you could have a day that is full of small (or some big) moments of kindness, joy, thoughtfulness, success, care and more, but your brain has been trained (by itself and nature) to only see and recall the things that didn’t work out and could be threatening to you. 

When I am stressed, I can tell that my thoughts are focusing on the things that are not going the way I wanted them to, the things I am not able to change, and all the things that continue to be difficult. No matter how hard I try, at times, to push myself out of these thoughts and tell myself “you are spiraling into negativity”, it never just pulls me out of the stress. It brings more awareness, but there is still usually more stress to come. Instead, I need something to help bring joy, light, and balance back into my thoughts and outlook. 

Regularly practicing gratitude helps to shift your brain into better balance, training it to also see the things that are good from your day, that otherwise might go unnoticed, but can make a huge difference in your outlook, resilience to stress, stress management, and overall well-being. The hard part is to actually take a step and do the practice, both when you are feeling stressed and when you are feeling less overwhelmed. 

You can set up some set ways to practice gratitude, with journals, meditations, routines, etc. These are wonderful, but, at times, can also seem stressful or “one more thing”. You can also infuse your day with some gratitude practices that help to not only give you the practice, but create a life built around this gratitude, without feeling the pressure.

Here are 4 ways to sneak more gratitude into your day:

  • Dinner Table
    • When you sit down for dinner with yourself, your partner, your roommate, or your family and kids, try using this as an opportunity for gratitude. Take a moment to share 1 thing from your day that you’re grateful for or that went well or that is “working” for you. 
    • This gives some accountability and also creates a conversation that sparks from a place of gratitude. Plus, you might get to share an inspiring story, or learn and listen to one, that might have been forgotten or left out otherwise. 
  • Bedtime (for kids and grown-ups)
    • If you want to end the day with gratitude (something that studies show helps to create a more positive memory when reflecting) , try practicing gratitude when you go to bed, or when you get your kids to bed.
    • As you get into bedtime routine with your kids, have them share one thing that went well or that they are grateful for from their day.
    • You can also share your with your kid, or you can share your when you go to bed, or just make a mental note or jot it down or say it out loud when you go to bed alone. 
  • Morning/Evening Intention
    • You can also use gratitude, in journal or meditation form, as a way to start or end your day with intention. It can become part of your morning or evening routine. It kind of adds this into your usual morning and evening routines, so you are more tuned in and intentional. 
    • Take a few minutes to start your day with gratitude, setting the intention to live your day with gratitude, focusing on what is going well. 
    • You can also end your day, reflecting on what went well, in order to feel more calm and grounded when you end your day, and to let go of stress from the day. 
  • Sticky Note Reminders (when something “good” happens)
    • Another way to keep noticing gratitude is to have reminders near you of the good pieces of your day and life, so you are able to see them and be reminded, even when you forget to have a specific gratitude practice.
    • You can try keeping some sticky notes out, on your desk, dresser, counter, etc, that you can use to write down moments of gratitude or positivity when they happen. You have a really good coffee – write it down. You get great feedback – write it down. Dream job – write it down. Student reaches goal – write it down. You get 5 minutes to yourself – write it down. 
    • Then leave the sticky notes where you will see them and be reminded of all that is going well, especially in those times when all seems against you. Try leaving them on your bathroom mirror, your desk or computer monitor, a dry erase board in your office or classroom, or even in your car (if you use it to get to work). 

Now that you have a few ways to sneak some gratitude into your day, it’s time for you to put it into action. How can you add more gratitude into your day?  Share your favorite gratitude strategy (or the one you plan to start using!) in the comments. 

For more ways to practice gratitude, check out the Gratitude Planner in the SLP Stress Management Shop.

Or sign up below to access the free SLP Toolbox resource library.

Much Love, 

Jessi

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24Aug

3 Ways to Have a Better School Year

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Career Advice New SLP Podcast Stress Management
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better school year

With many SLPs facing back to school time – either as school-based SLPs, parents (that’s me!), or just community members – it is an exciting and kind of scary time. There is so much that is new, so much that is uncertain, and so much that you know will be stressful going into it.

A new school year or work year, or just a shift in our schedule or setting, can seem incredibly daunting. There is so much that you have to learn, set up, and get ready, on top of all of the new protocols and changes that you are facing due to the ongoing pandemic/COVID (and, often, the lack of support or mixed messages from states and districts). It can be really scary, on top of the stress of being an SLP. 

But it doesn’t have to be a year of ongoing stress.

Even with all that is uncertain, and the underlying stressors of being an SLP, there are some small things and changes that you can do to help make it easier. 

These are the things I wished I knew when I started out in my first job as a school-based SLP. It would have helped me feel less lost, less overwhelmed, and maybe even more connected to what I was doing. 

3 ways to have a better school year:

  • Focus on what is working
    • Ummmm, being an SLP is no joke. There is going to be a lot that will be challenging. This isn’t meant to overwhelm you or scare you. Being an SLP is absolutely Mother Flipping amazing and it is also a lot of work. You know SO much about a lot of things, and can help people in so many ways. This is great, and it can also be incredibly stressful and overwhelming. There are things that will not go well – sessions, caseloads, workloads, productivity, scheduling, groups, activities that totally bomb, piles of paperwork, etc. But there will also be things you do really, really well, that others do not do as well. You might be really awesome at engaging your students with real world stories, or doing crafts (so not me), or picking out books and themes, or finding fun games, or just having a convo with them. 
    • These may not be what the “best” (ugh, eyeroll) SLPs are doing, but if they resonate with you, and you do them well, then they will be beneficial, more so than using someone else’s tools and strengths. THIS is what can really help your students (or clients) to thrive and flourish and grow – all the things that are truly important. 
    • Take a moment to focus on these. See what it is that is working for you, or what is going well, and shift to focusing on these first. The rest will come later. If it’s even needed at all. 
  • Add in afternoon routine or transition:
    • This is so, so crucial. Your brain needs a shift at the end of the day to help you let go of the day and be more present at home. You know when you have left work, physically, but your thoughts are still on work – the upcoming meetings, the worrying about a student, the session that went wrong, the piles of paperwork, etc? This happens when your brain is overloaded and hasn’t shifted out of work mode yet. It makes it impossible to be present and is incredibly mentally draining. 
    • Give yourself a moment at the end of the day to pause and shift, using ritual or routine of some sort to help your brain recognize that work is over and to let it go. It can be something simple, like doing a stretch, writing 3 things you are grateful for, or grabbing a cup of tea before you leave. Or it could be longer like a walk on the way home, doing some meditation or yoga before you leave your home office, or reading a book. Anything that helps you break apart the day will work.
  • Have some boundaries
    • Oh, yikes! These are really hard to do, but, also, so important. Setting boundaries will help you to prevent being overworked, overwhelmed and burned out. They can be uncomfortable to do and can seem pushy or “too much”, but they are necessary to keep going. 
    • Try utilizing the word “no”. It is hard and can seem mean, but it is absolutely not. (See, I just did it!). Saying “no” gives you space for more things that will lift you up, keep you connected and keep you thriving AND it also helps others see where you really are not able to help or take on more. Saying “yes” out of guilt only adds to your overwork and overwhelm. It takes practice, but start small and try it out. Guilt-free. Try “Sorry, I am not able to take that on right now” or “No, thank you” or “This is not possible for me. What can we do instead?”.
    • Along with “no”, leave work at work. Ok, ok, I know it is not always possible. Instead of setting huge lines of always/never take work home, try for one night a month to bring it home, and set aside time to do it. If you constantly bring it home, and leave it in the corner, staring at you, it will only make you feel guilty and pulled in opposing directions between home and work. (This goes for staying late as well – choose one day a week/month to stay and get it done). 

These won’t get rid of all the stress – I wish!! Or make things like health and safety instantly better – I really do wish on this one. But they will help to make your year more manageable, help you find more freedom, and give you a better foundation to show up, grow, and be an amazing (kick butt) SLP.

Which one of these will you start using more of? Share in the comments below or send me a message at jessi@jessiandricks.com!

For more tools to help you manage and reduce your SLP stress, make sure to subscribe to the FREE resource library, the SLP Toolbox. It is full of stress management and mindfulness resources, made for SLPs, to help you better reduce and manage your stress, without adding to it. Sign up for free below.

Much Love, 

Jessi

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18Aug

Small Changes to Create Big Shifts

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Stress Management
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small changes to create big shifts

Recently (solidly over the last 6 months) I started running again. A few times a week, I lug my 2 kids to a nearby trail, load up with snacks (them, not me), and plop them into the running stroller. I put on some music and we start down the trail, 2 miles in a loop. By the end, I am sweaty (even in 30 something degree F weather, and definitely when it’s 90+F) and feel tired but energized. 

It might sound not so fun, but we all really do have a fun time on our runs. 

The thing is, when I started, it was really, really hard to do. 

  • My knee hurt for a month or so the first time I started running again (back in March 2020, so I took a break until the Fall).
  • My feet hurt.
  • I had shin splints for a few weeks. 
  • My legs would ache when I started to run.
  • I would barely get through 2 miles.

Eventually, it started to get a little better – with the help of some new shoes and building up some strength. But, it could have also been really easy for me to feel defeated and not continue. I was running 2 miles, and feeling like I couldn’t go any further, when I used to be able to run half marathons. What was taking me nearly 30 minutes, and a lot of breaks, was something I used to be able to do in 20 minutes or less. 

It was incredibly frustrating at times, but it also gave me a place to work from. 

I could have been mad about a lot of things:

  • My pace was slower
  • My body felt heavier
  • My legs were achy
  • I couldn’t sprint without my legs hurting (and I LOVE sprinting right at the end)
  • I was taking breaks. So many breaks in so short of a time.
  • I was pushing nearly 70-80 lbs of kids and stroller

But I also remembered a few things:

  • It had been 6 years since I had a steady running practice
  • I had 2 kids since then
  • I lived in a place with hills, not Florida or the South Carolina Lowcountry
  • My shoes were really old, and my new shoes need to be broken in
  • I was, well, older…

If I expected myself to be able to get out and run 13.1 miles, or even 4 or 6 miles, then, yes, I was going to be disappointed. It was unrealistic. And, if I set my expectations, or goals, to reach this really big amount of mileage, say in the next month or even year, I might also be really disappointed, or, more likely, I would feel defeated and probably want to give up.

But…if I set my goal at the smaller point, and kept reassessing it as I progressed, I would not only have a lot of wins along the way, I would also increase the chances that I would in fact reach that goal and more.

And that changes EVERYTHING.

Now, I notice how much stronger I feel and how I can really push it to go further or faster. Some days I’m slow and some days I’m fast – especially with the stroller 80 lbs now). But I know that I am always, steadily and slowly, creating small changes and they have led to big shifts.

What does this mean for you? It’s not really about “running” at all. It’s about the goals. 

Setting a monstrous goal does not always work, even if that is where you want to go. It is better to set a small goal, or make a small shift, and continue to make small shifts on top of those, if you want to stay active in reaching those bigger goals. It’s what we do for our students and clients, but we forget to do for ourselves. The simpler the goal, and sometimes more scaled back, the easier it will be to reach and then keep building from there. You can aim for the big goal (say, “r” at the conversational level or running another half marathon), but you don’t reach for that yet. You start with the first steps (“r” in isolation, or running 1-2 miles without stopping), and then work towards mastering those. 

Instead of focusing on the big goal of being able to run the way I used to or to run another Half Marathon, I focused on increasing where I was. I could work towards 2 miles with no breaks, then maybe 3 or 4 miles, eventually 6, and continuing from there. 

This way, I am making realistic goals (like the ones we set for our own students and clients) and creating big shifts from there, instead of looking at where I am and where I wish I was, and not feeling like it could ever be possible.

When you are looking at your own goals, especially towards stress management, incorporating mindfulness, and/or personal development, you might be expecting it to be “fixed” and no longer an issuerightnow. Or at least within the next week or month, and then not have to worry about it anymore. Or not have stress still be prevalent. But it takes small changes first, built up over time, to create those big shifts, and to help those big shifts not be an overhaul that fails after a few weeks, but become a gradual part of your lifestyle. 

You need to find your starting point. Then, you move forward from there. 

Take a moment right now to work through some of these questions/prompts and create your starting point:

  • What is your main goal with your daily stress?
  • Where are you with it right now?
  • Is your main goal achievable and realistic for right now?
  • If not, how can you break it down to the smaller, but very important, starting place? Example: You want to meditate to manage your stress for 30 minutes a day. You currently have tried meditation once for 3 minutes on an app. Jumping into that HUGE goal would be a lot right now, and, most likely, not feasible. How can you break it down? Start with meditating for 3-5 minutes 3-5 days a week. Once that is solid and not even something you think much about, build it up (if you even need to or still want to).
  • What is your action step or plan to make it happen? From The example above: download a meditation app and figure out what time during the day will be consistent and easiest to start doing. 

You can go through these on your own in a journal or notebook, or you can download the guided “Small Changes to Create Big Shifts Workbook” available in the SLP Stress Management Shop.

For more resources, like FREE meditations and movement audios as well as exclusive discounts on courses, make sure to sign up for the FREE SLP Toolbox. A resource library full of tools to help you, as an SLP and human, reduce and manage your stress better. You can subscribe below.

What is your small shift? Leave it in the comments below to help share and solidify it!

Much Love, 

Jessi

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9Aug

5 Myths About Gratitude and Positivity

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Gratitude Stress Management Uncategorized
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myths about gratitude

Gratitude is not for the faint of heart, overly bubbly, or ignorers of the reality of life. Positivity, especially when there is a pandemic and a lot of resistance to cultural diversity and a ton of changes going on, can seem like a bit of a fluffy, syrupy, overly sweet and sentimental way to not validate someone, dismiss feelings, and ignore what is really going on. It can seem toxic, but it isn’t always so.

Gratitude, true gratitude and positivity, do not ignore the feelings and reality of the situation at hand. They accept it, without trying to change it. They also look at the bigger picture and pull in the pieces of the day, and your life, that are working, that are good and thriving (or simply surviving), and that shine a little brighter. They validate some of the good and positive feelings you are also experiencing, or may be missing from your day.

Here are some common myths and misconceptions that you might have, or may have heard, about gratitude and positivity.

5 Myths About Gratitude:

  • It is weak
    • Heck no. Having gratitude is hard. When your brain is reminding you of how much everything sucks, and you feel that there is nothing good or noteworthy from your day, and that the world is unfair and against you, it can be really, really difficult to shift into a mindset of gratitude. 
    • It is also not just some generational nonsense. Studies have shown that gratitude helps to build resiliency and strengthen your brain, which is tough stuff. So if anything, gratitude is strong and empowering, not weak. 
  • It is toxic
    • Not actual gratitude. Toxic Positivity (and Gratitude) is when you start to ignore or pretend that everything is ok, when it is absolutely not. This kind of thinking is when you turn everything into a good thing, even if , deep down, you are upset and it is a really bad thing. It is a dismissal, rather than an acceptance “AND” gratitude for other pieces. 
    • Actual gratitude is not ignoring the hard things or turning them into something good (again, there is a difference here between toxic and seeing what you learned from something). It is saying that both things exist, even when they are off balance. There are good pieces, sometimes small and minute ones, alongside the tougher, harder parts of life. 
  • It ignores the negative
    • Nope. It acknowledges this part, but your brain is already doing that too. You already know that you are upset, having a hard time and noticing all the things that are going wrong. Gratitude simply says “Hey! Those things suck and these things are also happening. Let’s acknowledge them, too”. 
    • It’s not ignoring the negative, but embracing the other parts. These are the parts that sometimes get pushed aside when there are other, more vocal, louder parts that want you to focus on them. But they are equally, if not more so, important to your well-being and for a full picture and perspective. 
  • It dismisses your feelings
    • Not at all! You are allowed to (and should) feel all your feelings. There really are no “good” or “bad” feelings, and even saying negative vs positive can be misleading. Feelings are feelings. 
    • Noticing more of the things you are grateful for simply shines a light on the things you might be overlooking or dismissing (unintentionally) as “not as important”, because they don’t need to be solved or resolved or “fixed”. Gratitude practices help you to not dismiss, but instead acknowledge all of your feelings. 
  • It doesn’t really do anything
    • Sometimes it sure can feel that way when you’re working on stuff that is not tangible, or when results take awhile to show. Gratitude does do something though and, in fact, it does quite a lot. 
      • Brain: trains it to look at positive, reduces stress
      • Body: reduces stress and stress response in the body as well
      • Mindset and Outlook: builds resiliency, looks at the positive and not just the negative
  • BONUS Myth: It is super trendy
    • Ok, this one is pretty true, but trendy isn’t always a bad thing. Gratitude is really trendy right now, but it is because it works. With an increase in studies and resources, gratitude is easier than ever to learn about, access and understand the benefits of. 
    • You can ignore the trendiness of it, and stick to a tried and true gratitude practice. That way, once the trends die down, you can continue to stick to your Gratitude Practice. 

Here’s the thing, your brain is wired to keep you alive. It is about surviving, not thriving. This part has to be trained and taught. Your brain is going to look for the negative and the things that are going all wrong, and dwell on them, to keep you safe, to alert you and to get you to possibly problem solve or automatically react (think fight, flight, or freeze). It is there to stress you out. Over and over again. It is not the enemy, more like a well-intentioned, over protective friend that creates more chaos and stress in your life. 

You have to train your brain to look at the things that are positive, and from there, you will thrive. 

Now that you know what might have been holding you back, you can start to infuse more of it into your day. 

Need some help getting started? Make sure to check out the gratitude meditations and journal templates in the SLP Toolbox, by subscribing below, or grab the printable (digital with a PDF app) journal “Gratitude Action Plan” available in the SLP Stress Management Shop.

What myth have you heard about gratitude? Share in the comments below!

Much love, 

Jessi

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29May

5 Ways to Start Meditating Regularly

Posted by: Jessi Andricks Categories: Meditation Stress Management Yoga
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start meditating more regularly

When I first started practicing yoga, one of the things I heard people talk about was the “zen” moments they experienced from meditation. As someone who was feeling chronically, secretly stressed, like non-stop, and was “supposed to be” a happy, soon-to-be married with a solid career and big new house mid-twenty-something, I was very intrigued by this notion of “zen”. It was in fact what drew me to practicing yoga and kept me going, and showing up 10-30 minutes late, to a yoga class on Saturdays. There was this idea of finding some peace and some calm and breath, but I usually felt boredom, anxiety and the undercurrents of my stress still lingering. 

But then one day, my yoga practice changed, I went to a studio that pushed me and challenged me and showed me there was so much more to learn and do and grow within. I was in love. Eventually, I decided to sign up for yoga teacher training. 

I loved the physical practice. The creativity, the challenge, the breath. The physical practice was challenging, so much so that at times it wore me out. But it also gave me something to focus on, solely, for an hour at a time. An hour when I did not have a moment to do anything other than breathe and try not to fall over, nevermind think about my career and the stress that was growing and if I had made a huge mistake. I dove into the physical practice day in and day out.

But not so much with meditation. Sitting still to do “nothing” for even 5 minutes seemed like a waste of already precious and fleeting time. I would rather be sleeping or moving or prepping for the day ahead, or searching for a new job, than sitting to “clear my mind”. My mind was not clear and was increasingly getting more crowded as my stress and discontent with my work grew. 

During yoga teacher training, one of our homework practices was to meditate. We were instructed to sit for 5 minutes (set a timer) and count down from 75. If your mind wandered, start over again or make a mental note. I dreaded this practice and rarely did it. My mind wandered constantly. I felt as if I could count AND list out all the things I still had left to do in my day at the same time. It was not helping me feel “zen” or peaceful. It was not helping me with much of anything. At least, that is how I felt.

Eventually, when I quit being an SLP for nearly 5 years, I taught yoga and helped run yoga studios. I taught the physical practice for about 10-12 classes a week, wrote numerous articles and blog posts about it, ran workshops, and helped grow the community in the town I lived in. The practice I taught was more physically demanding, to help people get into their bodies and out of their heads. And I often talked about meditation, but rarely took a moment to fully include it in my teaching, or in my own practice. I understood the “idea” of it – that people felt really, really great after – but I didn’t understand why it was so great or what was really going on. 

After I came back into the SLP field, I started looking into resources to help with burnout and stress, and found meditation popping up time and time again. 

So I researched all the ways that it had been studied, and learned about how it helps reduce stress, affects the ways the brain responds to stress, and how it can help to build resilience to stress in your body and brain.

After that, it became more about “how the heck do I make this a reality” and less about, “what is this really doing”. I started practicing regularly, as much as I could, but often had difficulty sticking with it. 

I wanted to start meditating regularly, but there was a lot of things that made it more difficult:

  • Full time job
  • Other hobbies
  • The physical practice of yoga
  • Pressure and perfectionism
  • Time with family vs self-care time
  • Finding good practices
  • No job
  • Young kids
  • Young kids at home full time
  • Pandemic….

Eventually, I found a few things that worked for me and that helped me to incorporate meditation into my regular routine, or to get back to it more easily when I noticed I had gone astray. 

They were things like:

  • Having a conversation with my family about my mediation practice
  • Becoming aware of what I felt like when I was meditating regularly, and when I wasn’t
  • Figuring out which pocket of tie in my day worked best
  • Having some apps and site to use
  • Guidance – I did NOT like meditating on my own, “freestyle”. I wanted some support and structure. 

After doing this, and giving myself some compassion, permission and acceptance, I was able to incorporate a more consistent and regular meditation practice into my day, and start meditating regularly. It is not perfect, and meditation is never about being perfect, but it does allow me to meditate on most days, notice when I have been falling out of my habit, and easy ways to jump right back into it.

Here are 5 Ways to Start Meditating Regularly:

  1. Use an app: 
    • This makes it so much easier. Having an app or a site that you can access easily, and from nearly anywhere, means that you can meditate and take your practice with you, no matter where or when you need it.
    • Plus, it offers a very simple, structured spot for the meditation itself to be. You don’t have to come up with as much of a game plan, because it is already there for you, by clicking open your app or logging into a site. 
  2. Find a style you like:
    • It is important to actually like or look forward to the meditation practice. It doesn’t mean it won’t be challenging or should be easy, superficial self-care, but it does help to somewhat like the experience.
    • Look for a style that fits your style and personality, or what holds your attention the best.
    • Here are a few options: guided audio or self-guided, explanatory style or actual practice, mantra-focused or breath awareness, better sleep or stress relief, compassion or gratitude as the topic. 
  3. Set a realistic time of day (and stick to it):
    • If you are going to do it consistently, make it easy to be consistent. 
    • Find a time of day that is easy for you to sit down and meditate. Not a morning person? Maybe waking up 5 minutes earlier isn’t going to work for you. Evenings packed and stressful? Maybe you already have enough on your plate then. 
    • Choose a time of day that already has an opening or that you are craving this type of moment – quiet, peace, ease, breath. 
  4. Set a realistic time limit:
    • I recently read a book that was amazing and said to meditate for 20 minutes a day – not going to happen. My days, and your days, are already packed enough and 20 minutes seems like very precious and hard to come by time. 
    • Choose an amount of time that is realistic, and then, if you ever want, you can do more. If 1-5 minutes is ideal, that is perfect. 
    • It is better to have a time you can do, than to feel let down when you can’t do more or to give up because the time is too much of a commitment in your already packed day. 
  5. Accountability:
    • Find a way to stay connected and feel like you are part of a community, a member, or have someone that you are “in it” with – even if they are not actually doing it, but can respect and help you as you are in it. 
    • Join a community online or FB group, find an app that feels like a community, have an accountability partner, or text with a friend or have them text you.
    • You can also go about this solo, but hold yourself accountable. Set a reminder in your phone. Have your app ready to go when you wake up (if you meditate first thing). Mark it in your calendar, so it is part of your day already. 

It is often not the meditation itself that keeps you from sticking to the practice (although it can be challenging at times too), but the idea of finding time to do it, how to do it, and what it will be, that keep you from diving in. With these new tools, you’ll be more likely to start and stick to your practice, gaining all the benefits that come with a long term meditation practice, as well as the ones that happen immediately. 

If you are looking for some resources, check out the SLP Toolbox, a free resource library full of tools to help SLPs, like you and me, manage and reduce stress.

And while you are at it, hit “play” on one of the many meditation audios and give it a try. You’ll have everything you need to get started and keep going.

You can access it by signing up below:

Need one more push to start meditating regularly? Download the “Self-Care tracker ” from the SLP Stress Management Shop, to keep printed out and in your office, on your nightstand, in your meditation corner, or download it to your phone or tablet, so you have these reminders to keep you going once you get started.

Much Love, 

Jessi

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